My father died a week ago. I won't allow myself to cry. He wouldn't want me to. I'm just hurt. You know, the type of hurt where u don't know what to do or say. All you can do is sit there and stare off into the world. And wonder, my god, how much wondering a person can do in a matter of seconds.
My mother is taking it great, considering she's dead. I'll have to stay with my aunt or the squirrels at the park. Which ever is more welcoming. I wasn't very hurt when my mother died. She had left me when i was no older than 2. Shortly after, she got into a car accident. Karma.
So, here i am. At his funeral, looking at most of these people who i can't even remember who they are. They are just here for the free food. Pshh, i would've came just for that too.
People come and go wishing me good luck and things like that.
"You're gonna be fine" or "He loved you so much, Elle"
I knew that shit. I knew all that. I just wanted to leave.
Even Max was saying these things.
"You're gonna get through this."
"I don't think so"
Max smiled that stupid grin that always makes me feel better.
We've been together for 7 years.
Ha. That deserves some type of reward.
Max took me by the hand and led me to his car. It was one of those cars where when u see it, u punch your friend and say " Punch Buggy!" A very pale shade of yellow that old fart was.
We don't even say goodbye to anyone. We didn't even care. We just left.
"where to?" i ask.
"When we get you home, pack yourself a toothbrush dear. Pack yourself a favorite blouse."
I look at max. "Sure"
Max looks at me. "Sure"
We pull up in front of my dads house.
I can see Max staring at me from the corner of my eye. He's thinking about what to do next.
"It's okay. Take ur time", Max says as he turns off the car.
This place was my home for my whole life. This is where i took my first steps. Where i had my first tooth pulled. Where i snuck in my boyfriend a few times. Where i had multiple pets. This is the place where i found my father sleeping on the floor. But he wasn't sleeping.
Max was right I don't want to go in there. If i do i might not come back out.
"I need your help"
"yes, Elle?"
"What happens if we do leave."
"All our troubles would go away. The wind would lift them as we drive through the night. Baby, come on."
I'm sold.
"Drive."
