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6 days before treatment wednesday after school
wink: my parents aren't home tonight
wink: wanna do homework together? :)
wink: i'm actually scared
wink: what if i pass out in the middle of night and nobody's around to help me
deep: i aM GOING TO SLEEP WITH YOU FOR ONE NIGHT
deep: but first please come to my house later because you text me really late
deep: y'know choosing shirt and snacks
deep: oh yea i left my biology homework
deep: lol gonna bring that tonight
deep: sorry for the spam
deep: looking forward for the sleepover tho
deep: ily jihoon <3
the news spread faster than the wifi connection in woojin's house. i've heard some people called us 'faggots' and stuff. but we never get bothered of it.
i also had to explain everything to hyungseob and woojin. yes, including the 'i have cancer and i'm going to die soon' part. now only my parents, teachers, jinyoung, hyungseob and woojin knew about my condition.
"i am very disappointed of you," hyungseob said as we walked home together.
"why don't you tell us earlier?" woojin added.
"yeah me three!" jinyoung chimed in.
i replied with an irritated look, "i don't want everyone to worry over me everytime. it's annoying enough to know that i'm kinda famous among girls in school because i'm cute and handsome."
the three of them didn't dare to answer back. i kind of felt bad for yelling at them. however sometimes i just had to be honest with my friends.
"bye guys!" the couple waved at us as we split to different route. we waved back, jinyoung spared a glance on me.
"don't you think they're goals?" he asked.
from the distance, i could see them holding hands and laughing at each other's jokes. well maybe not jokes, just some normal couple conversation.
"they've dated for a long time."
"i've known you since i was a baby, jihoon."
"that doesn't count. you've been my boyfriend for two days."
"boyfriend huh? i'm shocked that doesn't sound strange coming out from you."
"shut up, i'm hungry. cook me your udon jinyoung-ssi."
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park household wednesday winkdeep alone time
"why do school system value grades more than learning?" jinyoung complained as he slammed his book close. i relate to him hundred percent.
"wait until you're 3rd year, you're going to feel the same as me."
"but next year..."
"...."
"i can't imagine not seeing you for the whole year. jihoon, don't leave me."
how did the topic change so fastly?
"...."
"please jihoon?" he begged. i bit my lip to hold in my tears. "i promise i won't laugh at you if you're bald or ugly. as long as i can see and talk to you, it already makes me happy."
"goddamn it, jinyoung."
"if you really go to other country for your treatment, please return to korea after you get well soon yeah?" he cupped my left cheek, wiping the tears away.
"i promise, i will go home alive and healthy for you." i actually doubted it. alive and healthy were not the right words to use.
"thank you." he embraced me, i hugged him back. it took a moment before we pulled away.
we sat on the couch to watch some shows. it was nine o'clock, still a bit too early to sleep. he wrapped his hand around my waist, which was not for the first time. he did it several times especially when we watch horror movie.
i remember that time when we were watching the scariest movie ever in the cinema. our screams were the loudest. not forget to mention that jinyoung accidently spilled his coke on someone's head in front of him when the jumpscare part came.
oh, those good times.
"is there something wrong?"
i wished for many things and one of them are true happiness.
"jihoon, you're dizzy?"
but true happiness is fake.
"no, i'm just sleepy after taking the medicines," i responded.
jinyoung sighed in relief, "i'm glad. do you want to go to sleep now?" i shrugged my shoulders.
"let me know if you want me to carry you to your bedroom," he reminded me. he sounded so overprotective, i felt really loved. love as in pure romantic love.
i laid my head on his lap and pulled his sleeve. "can you sing me a song?" he stared at me for a few seconds before nodding slowly.
"i'll protect you. what do i do, the spell isn't releasing. how, how did this happen. my heart that is hotter than the sun. maybe, maybe, it's probably love."
despite that i always made fun of his singing ability, his voice soothed me this time. he sung the song while stroking my hair. it felt really nice, i eventually fell asleep before he finished the song.
