Nicks POV
I haven't seen ben in days. I'm so hungover. I've been drinking for the past days he's been gone, and my beard is getting long and my eyes are giving out. I just feel so numb. I ruined everything. He could be dead and i wouldn't know. I never knew that I could feel so much for a person. He probably hates me. He's never coming back unless I go for him. But I can't. What if he doesn't want me to chase after him? I've already got that chance and didn't take it. I drove away. I drove away. And he said he loves me the other night. But sometimes I can see how people are feeling. And he hates me. And I know it. I just shouldn't try anymore. I can't fall in love with someone else. I just don't think I can anymore. I'm a lying bastard. I cheated on him, I've lied to him, I've let him do whatever the hell he wants. I should've loved him and gave him what needed.
I don't even deserve to live. I can't live with this. How can I move on? I haven't moved on in my whole life. Especially from him.
I just miss his laugh, his saliva on my dick, I miss his hair, I just miss everything about him. I can't do this anymore. I have to confront him. Even if he hates me. I have to tell him I hope my life will always be in his eyes.
I turned on the news in Saint Louis, and I couldn't believe my eyes. A plan had crashed and there were only a few survivors. All of the survivors were being helped out of the plane, and I couldn't believe myself.
I swear I saw Ben being helped out of there with bruises and some cuts.
Oh no, what's gonna happen? There's no one to help him and there's no where to go. This is my chance, I have to go and pick him up. And he can't refuse, because where else is he supposed to go?
I drove to the airport as fast as I could, circling it until I saw him. Finally, about thirty minutes later, I saw him. I saw his beautiful face. I was so relieved. He looked like he was in so much pain. I pulled up and got out of the car.
I was so happy to see him. But he didn't even look up.
Bens POV
is that really nick? That's just what I need right now, him to be here and ruin everything like he always does. He's trying to talk to me, I can feel it, but I just feel too numb to look at him. I can't trust anyone anymore, I have to remember. No one from my past I can let in again.
He will just break my heart.
