The Outcome Of Our Summer Love (Louis Tomlinson Fan Fic)

7: Loving You Is Suicide

"I'm serious Melanie. You don't have to come over. We're just gonna take the kids out to the lake, have a picnic, and come back. The twins have been surrounded by drama the past few days and it would be nice for them to just have a family day." I explain while throwing stuff for lunch into the basket.

"Fine." Melanie huffs. "Ring me when you're finished, yeah?"

"Course." I nod.

"Something tells me this is about more than the twins having fun with their parents." Mel replies. I could feel her smirk. "This is about Louis."

"No it's not!" I shriek.

"Yes it is." Melanie  responds. "You still have feelings for him."

*Louis' POV*

"We're gonna go to the lake!" Tommy squeals.

"Yes we are bud." I smile.

"Daddy?" Alex asks, laying her head on my shoulder as I carry them out of their room.

"Yes?" I ask.

"Why are you and mummy always yelling?" Alex asks and starts to play with my hair.

"Um..." I trail off.

I didn't want to have to do this! Why should I be the one to tell my kids that their parents can't stand being in the same room together?! Well the mum, I on the other hand very much like being with her, but that's not the point.

"Well," I start but am cut off by Juliet's voice when I carry them downstairs. I freeze at the bottom so she doesn't see me.

"Look, whether the feelings I have for Louis are just as friends or something more, he means something to me. I guess it would be safe to say that going to the lake this morning isn't just about the twins." Juliet tells the person on the phone. I can't help the smile on my face while listening to those words.

"You know what kiddo, I don't think the yelling will be a problem anymore." I say.

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"Look! Look! There's a rope!" Tommy climbs off my lap to point to the top of a tree near the water's edge. "Can we use it?"

"You and Alex are too little to use the rope hun." Juliet chuckles.

"You and daddy?" Alex asks looking up at Jules from her lap.

"Oh my gosh, sometimes I hate this." Juliet groans getting up. I laugh. I toss my phone onto the blanket. Thank goodness we all wore swimsuits under our clothes. I pull my shirt up over my head. When I spin back around on my heel Juliet is wearing a pink bikini with white polka dots and black swim shorts. She looked so hot. I can't help a whistle from coming out of my mouth.

*Juliet's POV*

I blush like mad when I hear a whistle from behind me. "Watch it Tomlinson, I don't want to start yelling at you again." I say turning around. Might I be the first to say, HELLO SIX PACK! He puts his hands up in surrender. "Ughhh. Let's just get this over with. I have a feeling the water is going to be freezing." 

"Can I go first?" Louis asks.

"Sure." I sigh. Louis smiles bright. Why was he so happy about this? Louis wraps his arm around my waist and before I can do anything about it he pushes off sending us plunging into the cooling water. I bob back up. "You are such a dirty b******!" He smirks, arm not moving off my waist. "You give me a headache."

"So do you." Louis shrugs.

"You basically force me to yell at you with the things you do." I whisper looking down.

"I regret everything, you know that right?" Louis murmurs. 

"No." I shake my head.

"I never meant to hurt you. I hate the fact that I caused you so much stress." Louis starts to explain. I squeeze my eyes shut. "I knew how hard it would be but I never knew it would be this hard. If I had a time machine the first thing I would do is go back in time and fix all the wrongs I did you. I'm sorry. I don't know what else I can do to make you forgive me or if you even can forgive me. I know there is a one in a million chances in your forgivness though."

"Louis I don't know what to say. I want to forgive you but I don't know if I can." I croak.

"Then don't say anything." Louis lifts my head up to make me look at him. I knew what he was going to do and I was right. His lips softly press against mine as he pulls me underwater. At that moment I had never felt so attracted to him. Could I really forgive the boy who dumped my life down the drain?

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"Freeze!" Louis yells. I stop in my spot. "Alex, babe, you need to stop dancing." Louis laughs.

"What fun is that?" Alex looks up at him.

"You have a good point." Louis says pulling her off the ground. I turn the music back on and snatch Tommy.

"Dance party!" Tom squeals.

"Yeah!" We cheer. We start dancing around the twins' room like crazy people.

For the first time in three years I could say that I was having fun. Being around Louis again was like the sun coming out in hail and a giant rainbow appearing. He gave me so many emotions I couldn't understand. Honestly, I didn't want him to leave at the end of the week.

"You can go grab a shower." Louis offers while holding the kids on his shoulders.

"Ok!" I chirp. "I'll be back then." I skip out of the twins' room into the bathroom. Almost immediately after I step into the warm water of the shower a song comes into my head.

*Louis' POV*

I suddenly hear Juliet's voice coming from the hall. "Everywhere is still. Everything is restless in my heart. I hate the way this feels. Suddenly I'm scared to be apart. The days are dark when you're not around. The air is getting hard to breathe. I wish that you would just put me down. I wish that I could go to sleep." My eyes drift down. This was about me. Not even me. Us. "Loving you is suicide. I don't know, should I go or should I stay? I'm trying to keep myself alive. Knowing there's a chance it's all too late. But I heard you say you loved me. That's the part I can't forget. And I wish you'd come save me. Cause I'm standing over the edge. I should let you go. Tell myself the things I need to hear. But my brain is where you're wrong. That's why I'm loving you when you're not here. Feels like I drown in your every word. And every breath that's in-between. Somehow you got me where it really hurts. It's killing every part of me. Loving you is suicide. I don't know, should I go or should I stay? I'm trying to keep myself alive. Knowing there's a chance it's all too late. But I heard you say you loved me. That's the part I can't forget. And I wish you'd come save me boy. Cause I'm standing over the edge. Loving you is suicide. And my world's about to break. And I had as much as I can take. And love is a long way down. Loving you is suicide. And it's getting harder every day. I'm trying to keep myself alive. Knowing there's a chance it's all too late. And I'm way past every moment. But I'm still determind to fight. And I know it's taking all my strength. To give emotions alive. Loving you is suicide."