Random Bits of Things

Drowning

She trudges down the beach, her feet sinking into the cold sand. A stray tear runs down her cheek as she gets further and further away from the restaurant she had entered just minutes ago.  She rubs her arms in an attempt to warm herself up. The chilly autumn air was nipping at her arms, causing small goose bumps to form as she kept walking, trying to focus on putting one foot in front of the other. Her heart felt like it had been ripped out of her chest and stamped on, just left in the sand. She could hear someone further up the beach calling her name but she ignored the voice, walking deeper and deeper into the depths of the beach. She felt somebody grab her arm and she turned around to see the one face she wanted to see the least staring back at her. Another tear rolled down her cheek as she stared back at this person, she was filled with every emotion under the sun. Happy because they had come after her. Sadness because of what she had just witnessed. Betrayal because of what he had just done. Her head was spinning as she pulled away and started to run. She ran until her tears were clouding her vision and she couldn't go on because of the unbearable pain in her chest, in the place where her heart should be. She sank down to the floor, wishing for the pain to go away, but the pain was just starting to settle in. She tried to stifle the sobs that were threatening to escape her mouth but they were too strong. This part of the beach was deserted so there was nobody to hear her screams of pain, nobody to hear her cries, nobody to hear her sobs, nobody to hear her. Her head had started to ache from all her crying but still, she couldn't stop. She felt like a million knives were being stabbed into her heart at once, being driven into depths of her soul. There was no going back now. She couldn't feel anything, all her senses had been lost. She found herself wading into the shallow waters of the ocean, willing herself to feel something, anything, everything. But it all hit her too suddenly. All the hurt, the pain, the memories. It all just hit her too quickly. She collapsed down into the icy sea water, more strangled sobs escaping her lips as she cried harder than she had ever cried before. Her whole world was falling apart, her whole world including her. She dragged herself out of the water and trudged up the beach shivering in the cold wind. She couldn't believe her eyes. The man she had promised the rest of her life to, the man she had given her first child to, the man she had trusted with all her secrets, all her hopes and all her dreams. All her happiness, all her love. And he had just thrown it away like a used tissue. He had just thrown her away. Something had seemed suspicious when he left the house without his wedding ring on that morning, claiming he had just forgotten to put it on. Yet here he was, proclaiming his love to another woman, giving her another ring, promising her a life together , a family together, when he already had his own. It all came crashing down on her like waves on the shore. And she was drowning, drowning in hurt, drowning in pain. Drowning.