Drapple Fanfiction

My dear apple, you look so perfect!

It is another day Draco Malfoy needs to go to the shop. He needs to get cereal, milk, eggs, some fruit and some more stuff.

He walks around the shop and gets everything, except for the fruit. Draco gets to the apples isle. He looks at all the apples and sees a perfectly round green apple.

"Oh my. What a beautiful apple." He takes 10 apples, including the perfect one.

Once he pays and gets home he puts everything away and takes the perfect apple out.

"Hello there~" He starts talking to the apple. "My name is Draco~. What's yours~?"

Silence. "Apple? That's a nice name~. So. What kind of guys are you into~?"

Silence. "You're so shy, huh~? Don't worry, babe~. I can help you~." He brings the apple closer to his lips and kisses it.

After a few minutes he smiles. "You're a great kisser~." He looks down at his pants. A mountain is visible. "You got me excited~." He pulls the apple closer to him. "We need to think of a ship name. What about... Drapple?" Silence. "Yeah. I think it's cool too."

He kisses the apple...

And sinks his teeth into the apple. "Sorry. But I can't resist you. You look so perfect! I needed to!" He continues eating the apple and finishes eating it in a couple of minutes. "Apples taste so good!"

He throws away the seeds and goes to the bathroom and takes a shower.