If you aren't keen on cussing, don't read. Love you!
We left the very next day. Ashton was released from the hospital with bandages on his left arm and Calum on his right. Luke and I had packed their stuff for them so that we could start our trip immediately after Ash was released. We all piled in to the car, Calum driving, Ashton shotgun, and Luke and I in the back seat.
To avoid the awkward silence that would surely have commenced if I hadn't stepped in, I spoke. "So Lukey, which of your favorite countries do you want to see first?" He grinned widely and opened his mouth to reply. "I thought we would visit England first, then maybe japan, and I'd like to go back to the US..." he said, thinking hard. I was sure there were more countries he wanted to see, because he talked in his sleep and sometimes he would whisper his dreams to himself, but if that was all he really, really wanted then we would go there.
"Mate, that's not the world! Are you sure you don't want to see like, Paris or something?" Ashton said, somehow reading my mind. Luke's previous grin turned into a mellow, closed-mouth smile. He sighed and said, "It may not be the world, but it's the parts of the world that I need to see. I need to see the bright lights in Tokyo before the bright light takes me away, Ash."
"Okay, but what about England, why there?" Calum chimed in.
"I want to see the Big Ben one last time, before I run out of time," he must have thought hard on this. I swallowed the lump in my throat, trying to keep from choking up as I spoke.
"What about America, Luke?" my voice cracked, "what do you want to see?" He laid down on my lap, looking up at me with his sad blue eyes that melted my heart in year ten. How could I have ever hated him? He let out a shaky breath and answered my question.
"That's for you and me, Mikey. I want us to see the Hollywood sign, because I know some day that you and the boys are going to make it to Hollywood, and I won't be there on the red carpet with you, but I sure as hell will be cheering you on from wherever I end up. You've gotta remember to stay strong for me when I'm gone okay? Stay strong Mikey, please." By then I was crying, and not the "tears rolled down his glowing cheeks" crying, no, it was gross sobs. Luke wanted to spend his last vacation telling us how much we meant to him, and I could not handle that. I some how managed to get a breathless "I love you, Luke" out, but not much else. As I cried, Luke sat up to where he was on my lap facing me (he never wears his seat belt) and I finally got a chance to take in what the cancer was doing to him. Every part of him came with its own shadow. He was thin, but still so, so beautiful. His hair was thinning, but not very quickly, as he still had his majestic unicorn quiff that took my breath away. He leaned toward my face and pressed his soft lips into mine gently. "In case I don't make it..." He explained.
"You better make it, mother fucker. You're super penguin, bitch."
