Low battery. Two words I didn't want to see right now. I quickly run over to my backpack to grab my charger.
Where the hell is it? It has to be in here!
I start dumping everything out of my bag from makeup, my journal, and snacks. I begin to panic and check the smaller compartments of the bag.
Shit! I promised I would drop a new song tonight and now my laptop is dying. Wonderful. I really don't want to let down my supporters... Or LMN records. If this song doesn't come out tonight that's my ass.
"JAY!" I yell out from the studio door.
"Yo?!"
"Have you seen my char-" I say as Jay steps into the hallway with my laptop charger.
"Oh my god?! You had it the whole time?" I fuss.
"Well... umm. Yes." He says while looking at the ground.
"Seriously? You know I have to drop music tonight! I don't have time for this shit." I snatch the charger from his hand and run back to my studio space.
Okay Monica you have five minutes for finishing touches then its go time! Stay focused. Stay focused.
I look through the track for anything that's out of sync or could use more balance. I adjust the bass and drums one more time, and throw in small adlib vocals to the piece.
Perfect. This sounds like a Saucz track. With only three minutes left!
I log into Twitter and SongPage to inform my supporters about my new single.
*Hey sauczerz! I'd like to announced my new single 'TBH' is now out on SongPage!!! SO TURN THAT SHIT UP!! Don't forget I will be the dj for Kehlani's SweetSexySavage clothing launch party at The Silver in West Hollywood TOMORROW@ 7PM!!!*
I press the upload button and send out my tweet. A sigh of relief leaves my body as I plop down into a huge red bean bag. I could feel the stress and satisfaction of being my own producer glow around me. I love every moment of it. Even though I'm not my own independent label, I still do everything myself. And that's how I like it.
Working with other people would speed up the amount of music I release, but no one knows what I like. They don't know my sound. They don't know my style.'They' being other producers. Producers love to take on projects and forget what the artist is trying to accomplish. And as a producer myself I tend to do the same thing, but I want to be able to please whoever I'm working with. My goal is to make flawless quality music that people can enjoy. This explains my passion for deejay-ing, I love being able to control the vibe. However, when I deejay its not about me its about my audience. My supporters only know how I get down at events. After any show I always hear, 'Yo Saucz! I love when you dj! I really feel you in the songs!' Which is why I call myself Saucz, because I get lost in the sauce. Sauce being the music.
I hear a knock on the door and I escape from my thoughts.
"Its open!" I say.
The door softly pushes open. I lift my head up to see Jay, he looked a bit worried.
"Are you okay babe?" I ask.
"Yeah I am. I just feel bad about the whole charger thing. Just thought you had an extra one." He says lowly.
"Don't even worry about that! You know how stressed I get when I have to drop a song. I just freak out on anyone in my way, but all of that is over now!" I stretch out my body and get up towards Jay.
"It is? I'm glad!" He says while pulling me in for a hug.
I hug him tightly and listen to his heart beat. His heart beat was steady and calming. About 65 bpm? That seems about right.
"I've missed you today." I whisper to him.
"Me too." He says into my neck.
Yup. That still fucks me up.
He hugs me for a little bit longer then sighs, drops the hug, and sits on the sofa.
"Monica. You really have to stop working like this."
"What do you mean?"
"You what I mean. You just have to do everything yourself. I can help you, but you keep stressing yourself."
"Jay please don't start. You know how important it is for me to be self made."
"I do but I really hate seeing you like this. Especially when you have someone like me... Oh I don't know. Just some talented rapper. Who just happens to have an awesome team to help you produce music... But I'm nobody special."
"Here we go with the I am Jay Park speech." I laugh.
"I'm serious. I just want to help you be the best."
"I know... But guess what?!" I say while scrolling through my feed.
"What?"
"My song is number one on SongPage and I just dropped it an hour ago."
"That's my girl!"
Jay pulls me in for a kiss, but I stop him.
"Now what?" He sighs.
"Tell me that I was right. That I don't need any one. I am self made."
"You were right." He smiles and steals a kiss.
I tackle him on the sofa and he gently fights me back. He puts his hands on my waist and lifts me up. I scream a little bit try to kick him playfully. Jay successfully pins me down on the sofa and looks into my eyes.
"I'm not even trying." He whispers into my neck.
So that's how he wants to be?
I lightly trail my hands on his body while slowly pulling off his shirt. I noticed he bites his lip and lets his guard down. I start to sit up and run my fingers through his hair. He sits on the sofa with his head tilted back. I move over to him and straddle him.
"I like where this is going." He winks at me.
"Of course you do." I smile.
I began to kiss his neck and body. He starts breathing a bit heavily and I smile.
I've got you now.
I start to yawn and say, "Babe I'm tired from working tonight. I'll see you in the morning. Night love."
"Wow Monica. Really?!?"
"I'm not even trying." I laugh and leave the room.
"Fuck you babe!" He yells.
He thought. Cute. Real cute.
