The Bridge

Chapter 1
.
Psychosis 1
.
I was walking in a bridge, where I seek attention from an empty heart of mine, I speak from above having myself below, it was a cold night, All I know at that night is to bring love upon a woman of my heart, it was late and the church was closed, I brought fruits from a misunderstanding that her grandma was sick, so I can reach it though them, If soever They we're there at that time, I was also sick at that time that brought the thought that, should I go or not, it couldn't, my heart was beating slow tired like unto my fading Strength and a blurry eye sight, I cannot find anything right at that night, I sat in the side of the bridge looking at the moon, I was thinking, saying is her grandma fine or how does she feels and what can I do for them, it was wonderful to Think of caring for someone, yet I was still wondering If someone will do the same to my Family someday, But a thought came in my mind that it will reflect everything I am from what she is, but bit by bit as I visit, my heart made me realize that there was never a mirror unto it, but I for her and her alone that includes me,  Love never felt so good as they say,  I often write at my Phone saying why does my heart desire her and also about what I can do for her family, I look at them Individually even my heart was only one it was never for one but for her Love ones also, Christmas was far before it begins with the gifts that I was Planning for months, I was happy knowing my goal is, it is to make them happy even without receiving it, it's a happy heart for a sad mind of mine, it's sad to say it was for me for them, saying you Love yourself as you love them, those words from my heart has found me glittering in loneliness, every second counts, that becomes minuets to hours until the end of the day I fought for her in the delusions in my mind, I couldn't think much for myself that can make me happy at that time but her, my madness has overthrown the Trust In myself, I cannot sleep every night, there was a time that she is in my thoughts, delusions comes say she is not worthy of anyone, but my heart says you're preciously made, you could be more than the Odds says, even my life I desire to use just to make you smile, I've tried the Joy of your family but I was already satisfied seeing you as your father says it couldn't work by the rules of the Church, it was my satisfaction but the voices inside my head has brought me into wrath at that night unto a worker of my uncle, I never knew what I could do in my selfless heart yet it always leaves me satisfy after I sing songs from my Sick mind where voices in my head we're all unto her but I brought every bullets all unto me, knowing everyone can hear what's on my head, it was a long time before I realize the pain, that it was just me in the bridge at that night.