Behind The Mask

Chapter 64

Michael's POV

I look up from my chair at Debbie, expecting her to deliver the final blow.

"Debbie, I need to know. Is my baby still alive?"

"Michael, the doctors are trying to do the best to save both Anouk and the baby. This is why they placed her under artificial coma."

"What??? Why would they put her into a coma?"

"Michael, please calm down and listen to me. Her immune system is compromised. Someone sneezing around her could cause her death. Her kidney function is also nearly compromised. If the doctors left her like this, they would collapse and there is no way we can put her on dialysis fast enough to save her. In a state of coma, all the functions of the body are slowed down. Like when the bees go in hibernation, you know? So, while her kidneys rest from their usual functions, the doctors can administer drugs and try to repair them. Anouk is in no position now to sustain her own body functions and the baby's. She needs to be aided by having machines and drugs do that for her, until she becomes stronger."

"How long will they keep her like this?"

"At least until her immune system and kidneys are working within acceptable limits. Michael, I know this is tough on you, but you mustn't give up hope. Your wife is young, in her twenties, and this is a very strong point in her favor. She has the vitality to get through this. And...and I think that deep inside she fights really hard to stay alive and keep this baby."

I try to smile through a film of tears.

"How can you know that? You've never met her."

"I know one thing: that she risked everything to give you this gift, of fatherhood. This is the highest form of selfless love. I think that she will put up a good fight to be around you and give you this baby."

I start crying even harder and nod my head.

"That's my Nooki...she never complains when she's sick and doesn't feel well...she never wants me to see her vulnerable...All she ever wanted...."

I choke on my words and Debbie places and arm around me, sitting by my side. I wipe my tears and look in her eyes.

"All she ever wanted was to feel normal...She told me that so many times...she didn't want people fussing over her because she's ill...she didn't want me worrying about her...She just wants to be a normal woman, Debbie! And I can...I can totally understand that...you know..."

"I know, Michael...I know. Those punks outside with their stupid cameras...the Vitiligo, the lupus...You haven't been dealt a fair hand of cards in life."

I shake my head.

"And neither was Nooki. I think we found each other...because we could see behind each other's masks. I could see behind her mask of carelessness and constant rebuttal of my attentions to her...and she could see behind this mask of stupid smile I must wear for everyone to see. And when we looked into each other, we saw the same desperate need for normality in our lives. And we clicked...we just clicked. And for some months now, we though we found this normality...And now..."

"And now you will be strong for her and she will feel your strength and hang in there. Michael, she is a strong woman and a good woman. I do admire her. You know that I offered to give you children before...Well...let me tell you...once this is over, when you want to have more children, my offer still stands."

I frown.

"What do you mean, Debbie?"

"I'll be a surrogate for you and your wife whenever you want more children. It is out of the question for her to ever get pregnant again. I'm sorry, but I thought you needed to know this right now. Whatever happens, she cannot get pregnant again."