a work of art [meanie]

Chapter 39

1471 words
 
   
 
 
 

Wonwoo and Mingyu have been acting like a newly married couple for the past days. They've spent a lot of time hanging out together, either at Mingyu's house or at Wonwoo's. They hold hands often, the other sometimes sneaking a peck on other boys' cheek. They take long walks in the evenings, discussing everything and nothing. They share sweet kisses over their ice creams, tasting the ice cream rather on each other's lips than actually on the cone in their hand.

No matter where they are, they are always together.

But although things have changed (they are both now one hundred percent sure that they both feel the same way and they are able to trust each other fully) to them it feels like nothing has changed.

And even though they already act like they would be in a relationship, neither of them has brought it up; they have never agreed to become exclusive and start officially dating.

They don't really mind it though; they're both living in the moment, enjoying each other's company; they're simply happy as long as they can just spend time together.

But Mingyu has been thinking about them a lot lately, their small kind of relationship but not really, and he's definitely certain of one thing: he really wants Wonwoo to be his boyfriend.

He wants to introduce Wonwoo to all his friends as the beloved boyfriend of his, and he really wants to be able to walk hand in hand wherever and whenever he wants, without having to worry about getting seen by someone who knows them.

And that's why Mingyu starts thinking about telling his parents of his sexual orientation.

It's terrifying. Even the thought of coming out makes him so nervous that sometimes he needs to call Wonwoo to calm down (always patient and understanding Wonwoo manages to calm him only by talking, murmuring soft words with his reassuring voice). That has happened a few times. 

"You don't have to rush it, take all the time you need," Wonwoo always tells Mingyu, and Mingyu really loves how Wonwoo is so supporting and lovely, but he still can't push away the voice nagging in his head that he's slowing down their growing relationship. He doesn't want to mess up things again. What he wants is to prove Wonwoo that he truly wants this. To prove Wonwoo that he's sure about this now. He's not going to back out anymore.

He has already decided few times that 'Today I'm going to make my confession'. But, so far, he has always chickened out on the last minute. 

But it's all understandable, it really isn't easy, his life is going to change a lot. He's nervous because he's not sure if the change is going to be a good thing. He has no idea what is going to happen. 

As Mingyu eats dinner with his family, he goes through those same thoughts - once again.

I could confess now, why not? It isn't that bad. Right? I can do it. I think I can do it. Wait, no. What if they don't accept me, do I just leave the table? Mum seems to be tired, I shouldn't burden her any more than she already has been burdened today. That's right, I should leave it for some another day... No, I can't. Wonwoo has waited for so long. I should do it for Wonwoo if not for myself. Although it would help me also, I haven't felt like myself for a very long time. What am I even like? Who am I? I don't even know anymore! Maybe if I told them after -

"Mingyu? Earth to Mingyu?," his father's amused voice interrupts Mingyu's train of thought, and Mingyu snaps his head up.