Wrong Actions

3. Hospitalised

My body ached and was heavy, stopping me from moving as my eye lids were weighed down and drooping. I couldn't open my eyes; it felt as though a strong force outside of me was pulling them down, blinding me. For what felt like hours I fought against the strong urge to let the outside force on my eyelids win, but then I began to feel an odd sensation. It was hard to distinguish between the different parts of my body, but I felt warmth in what I thought was my hand. I focused on that heat, curious of what it was. Slowly, I began to feel more of my body, as if my sense was spreading from that one spot. When this strange experience reached my head sound suddenly filled my ears, surrounding me at a high volume. I could hear chattering voices, the whirring of machines and I became relying on only this once sense. My eyes became free aswell quickly. My whole body now felt loose and I could move again.

I shot upwards and snapped my eyes open fearing what I had just felt. A burning light overcame me and I slammed my eyes closed again, slapping my hands over the top of them. When I eventually opened them fully, I looked around absorbing my surroundings.

I sat in a startlingly white room with the strong smell of disinfectant and medical solutions. The uncomfortable bed beneath me was lumpy and sheets covered me, scratching against my skin. After looking down I realised I was in a hospital gown, a light blue piece of material tied carelessly around my torso.

Looking up again, I saw a doctor stood by my side, he smiled down at me, the smile reaching his eyes, making them crease at the corners. His gaze encouraged me until I looked past him and saw my mother sat leaning forward towards me. Bags hung under her eyes and her hair had it’s natural wavy style. My mum always took care to straighten her hair before ever leaving the house so this worried me. I suddenly panicked, why was I in a hospital bed what happened?

I racked my brain trying to think back to what I remembered last.

I clapped my hand over my mouth when I did.

My hands wrapped tightly around the edge of the rough sheet covering me and I pulled it up towards my chin as my knees followed. It can’t have happened. Cassey no. Please no.

Tears began to run down my face quickly and my mother shot out of her seat rushing towards me. She slid onto the bed beside me and wrapped her arms around me tightly. I leant against her chest but soon felt shaky sobs trembling through her to. The doctor slowy left the room closing the door behind him leaving us alone.

“It’s okey, sshh, sshh, I’m here May. It’s okey.” She spoke softly in my ear between gentle sniffles but she said it as if she was trying to convince herself and not me. I felt her arms loosen from around me and her weight left the edge of the bed. I lay back down in the bed curling into a ball on my side. The door creaked loudly and there was a murmur from outside it.

“Mam,  I need to check over your daughter just to make sure she’s okey. I’m sure what happened was just from shock and trauma from what I’ve heard so she should be able to leave by lunch” “Thank You Doctor, that’s good to hear” My mother’s voice carried thorugh the door and then I heard her retreating footsteps away.

The door swung open and the doctor from a few minutes before walked in taking a black clipboard from the end of the bed I laid in. He hummed gently, the melody I recognised to be the Scrubs TV Programme theme tune.

He stepped towards me to the side of my bed and reached up to peer at a bag of clear liquid hanging from a metal pole.