Be Happy

Tears

Her little feet pit pattered across the floor, my daughter, I had a daughter. If I'm being honest I was extremely surprised, I was now in the world of motherhood. I was not prepared for it either. But, I scooped her up, listening to her giggles fill the room, gave her a kiss on her forehead, and after putting her down I walked over to the kitchen table and signed the adoption papers. I couldn't be stuck in one place for the rest of my life.

    Her bright, wide, green eyes-which mimicked mine-looked up at me wondrously, "Where are you going mama?"

With my tote bag in my hand I ran my hand through her thin hair, "Mama has to go to the store, Daddy will be home from work soon."
She began to pout, her bottom lip pursing out. My chin quivered, "I love you so much Artemis, don't ever forget that."

With tears pooling in her eyes, ready to overflow with the grace and strength of a waterfall she asked, "Why can't I come mommy?"

I told myself I wouldn't do this, if I spend too long reminiscing and wishing I could stay, he would come home and I would have to. I still have wounds from the last time I tried to leave. I didn't want to leave my baby girl with the horrible excuse of a man but, she was not in my plan. I would take her to explore the world with me, I would love to do that but, she was still too young for the horrors that this world can hold, like this one right here. A mother abandoning her own child. I would feel worse if I knew that nobody was coming to help her but, I promised myself that as soon as I got to the nearest phone booth I would call the police to check on the house due to 'domestic violence' and by that time the man I had 'fallen in love with' would have given her a good smacking around, nothing too hurtful or damaging or rough but, just enough to get her into the system. She could explore the world on her own that way, she wouldn't have anyone to lean on though. Nobody to talk to, or laugh with, or anything.

She was still staring up at me, the savage sea of tears within her eyes had calmed. There was a look of curiosity. I still hadn't answered her. "You are coming with mommy silly, here pack up your favorite toys in this bag." I grabbed a plastic bag off of the table.

The tears had vanished and there was a look of light of happiness in her eyes, they were sparkling. She ran to her room grabbing all of her little toys, I could hear her singing something to herself from the radio, right melody completely wrong words.

She needed to hurry, if he came home before she was done packing up they'd both feel the wrath of him. She knew that he had been gentler with Artemis in the past, but now, caught in the act, he would have no mercy. His rage would overpower every other emotion. He would be seeing red. She called for Artemis to hurry, worried that he might show, so worried, she couldn't risk her daughters or her life.
She had breathed life into her daughter. The thought of being the cause of her death made her want to kill herself this very moment. She called to Artemis again who responded with a whiny comment about how she wasn't taking that long. She waited, the minutes were passing by slowly. The anticipation of the arrival of him made the clocks prolong their minutes, for they were waiting too. She looked down at her watch, only three minutes had passed. The clocks had the control, they seemed to be giving her more time, they knew the outcome of this decision, and they were trying to change it. But, alas you can't change what's already been done. They could do everything in their power but turn back time, that was too powerful for time itself to do, even though that would be the best option of any. But, she had hope, she was going to get out of here with her daughter, if it was the last thing she did. Her determination and courage was finally building, she could fight him, for once in her life she should take a stand against him, but she did not want to have to do that.
Finally her little girl came out of her room, plastic bag as stretched and full as it could possibly get. They were both ready. She rushed Artemis out of the house and into the car, strapping her into her carseat as quickly as possible. The clocks had now sped up time, it was moving at extraordinary speeds but, she was stuck. The minutes passed quickly but her fingers worked slowly, nervously, she needed to focus but her thoughts wandered to the last time she had tried to escape. She had to get multiple stitches and a cast for two bones in her arm.

Eventually, she had clipped Artemis in, the young girl was asking questions but she was only hearing white noise, she was cutting too close, her instincts told her something was going to happen, something wicked was going to happen.

She got into the driver's seat and started the car, as she began to back out he pulled up, she was already half way down the driveway by now but she needed to hurry, Artemis and her innocence waved to 'Daddy' through the window and in response he pulled out his pistol. He was surely drunk but no matter the condition he had articulate aim. But, he was sluggish at the moment, the car had already began to turn when he had pulled the trigger repeatedly.

Five bullets fired through the front windshield, all barely missing her as she sped away, she drove as fast as she could. Her thoughts were rattled, she was finally out of there. He had hit her, kicked her, shoved her, yanked her, smacked her, and so many more things, but now here she was, driving down the highway. She had no clue where she was going, maybe somewhere on the West Coast, Seattle maybe? Or San Francisco, Los Angeles, Hollywood? Somewhere where she could create a new life, somewhere she wouldn't be traced. He wasn't that clever anyways, and he wouldn't want to put effort into actually finding her, he would find a new girl to beat around like a rag doll anyways. Hopefully she'll have the common sense to just kill him and end the misery of more future women, but she hadn't had the courage or the heart to do that. All of the thoughts in her mind had blocked out all other senses.

Coming back to reality, to driving she realized that she hadn't heard from Artemis in far too long, she had been courageous enough to bring her little girl with her but she hadn't been smart enough to keep a clear head while driving. Glancing in the rearview mirror she was in horror of the sight, her little girl, her little Artemis had two bullet holes through her fragile, delicate body. One in the head and the other in the left shoulder. She was seeing red, her little baby was gone, she brought her for nothing, she would have been better off with that excuse of a man. She was to blame for the death of her own daughter.

The car swerved into the lane next to hers. She no longer had control of anything. Her daughter was dead, it was her fault. Her hands let go of the wheel and her foot slammed down on the pedal. Seconds later glass was shattering around her, and in her last moments still a part of this world she looked back to her daughter and a tear fell.