Chasing Piper (Book 5 of no hard feelings)

{24}

Piper Davis

Today is the day that I start my therapy sessions. I honestly didn't want to go. I didn't want to talk about my problems to someone who isn't gonna help me. As for the cameras, I told them personally not to follow me.

"Hi Ms. Davis, if you could just sign in right"The lady at the desk smiled. I nodded quickly signing my signature and took a seat.

Within seconds, I was called up to the lady's office. I sat down on the couch impatiently shaking my leg. I just really wanted to get this over with.

"Hey Piper, I'm Dr.Yolanda. Okay so just to begin with the first session, I want you to tell me a couple of things that's been happening to you and why you called us for therapy"Dr. Yolanda spoke as she closed the door and settled into her seat.

"Well um I had been having these nightmares, and I would wake up screaming and in tears. At first it took me some time to accept that I needed therapy."I explained. She nodded scribbling something down.

"Can you tell me the back story of these dreams and what you think is triggering them?"She asked. I nodded.

"Well, when I was 16, I was raped by my math teacher. I think the main thing that is triggering them is that when he was doing those things to me, I couldn't move. He had more power over me. It was something that scared me"I sighed.

"Now tell me about these dreams. How do they go?"

I shook my head. Explaining what that man did to me was hard enough. Dr. Yolanda nodded.

"Take your time"She nodded while righting something down.

"Well, it starts off regular soon, he'd just come closer and closer. Then I'd figure that I can't move, scream, do anything to protect myself. I was helpless"I shook my head feeling the tears build up.

"Have you ever felt disgusted with yourself afterwards? Tried self harm? Anything?"

"I um ran away"

Dr. Yolanda nodded continuing to write things down. It was quiet. I reached for the tissue in front of me and dabbed away my tears.

"Ms. Davis, just off of these 10 minutes, I collected some things about you. Although, you try to avoid things, something in you keeps bringing them back"She spoke.

"I don't get it"

"You won't let go. And I know, I know, it's a hard situation not to think about. But you need to forgive yourself"

"What do you mean forgive myself? I didn't do anything"I scoffed. She shook her head.

"I know, you need to tell yourself that you aren't the problem. You aren't the reason why this man did what he did. You have to break these walls you have"

"Trust me Dr. Yolanda. I've tried many of times to tell myself that. It dosent work. And I don't have walls"I crossed my arms.

"Yes you do, I can tell right now. Your actions the way you turn when you don't want to talk about things. You may have shared the story of what happened but that's not all you need to do"

"What do I need to do?"I asked.

"Explain why you think you have these dreams. Explain how you feel."

I nodded. I explained everything. Maybe this lady was helping. When I finished, I felt less disgusted with myself.

"Now, every night, I want you to write down a couple of things you like about yourself. When you are feeling sad, don't box yourself off. Go to someone for help. These simple things will take your mind off of things"

I nodded giving her a smile.

"Thats our session for today. Your next session is next Tuesday at 3"Yolanda smiled. I nodded as she handed me the card.

"Thank you"

She nodded as I collected my things. I walked out and downstairs.

**

Josh was laying in the bed. I didn't know what to say to him, I just laid next to him. Soon feeling his arms warp around my torso I smiled.

"Night Josh"

"Night love"