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Jupiter (a new beggining)

Dejected,sad and depressed; dispirited. Bet you didn't know what it meant. Dejected, something i feel every second of every day. When im trying to fall asleep at night, when im sitting in class listening to Mr. Darwin, or when im having dinner with my parents. Yes everyone at Ellington High hates me, but I don't need them they are all a bunch of pricks anyway. I think about ending my life, but it's to early, at least I always tell my self. To early because I'm only 16 and I have "to much to live for". A phrase my therapist Mrs. Raymond always uses "you have to much to live for, Jupiter you haven't even explored the world yet" That is true the only place I've been to is Arizona, that was when I was 4 years old though. I guess Mrs. Raymond is right. I'm walking to the bus stop, no I don't usually take the bus, but since Harley Carter destroyed my bike I'm stuck taking the bus. I'm sitting on the side walk waiting for the bus to come writing words in my notebook. I'm a big believer in words.
Lovely Words
1. Lovely
2. Gorgeous
3. Intelligent
4. Charming
5. Pleasing
6. Demure (shy, reserved)
7. Sugary
8. Affection
9. Summery
10. Brood (to think alone)
I like the word demure although I'm not shy or reserved I'm pretty outgoing. I'm very different from everyone else maybe that's why the kids at school don't like me. All they think about is having sex and who's gonna throw the next party so they can drink, smoke weed, and have sex. I'm still a virgin.  It doesn't bother me, well I try not to let it bother me. I start to hear footsteps witch is strange cause I'm the only person on this bus stop. I see him it's a guy, he doesn't look familiar to me. His hair looks like chocolate waves, he's white like a Canadian white, and he's very tall probably about six feet. I stop looking at him because I don't need another person calling me a freak. I can feel him getting closer. My heart is starting to race I have no idea why. He sits a foot away from me "this weather is shit, no offense but it really is shit" he's looking at me now, he's not wrong the weather here is shit "yeah it's like this every day cold and gloomy and disgusting" he chuckles. His eyes are big and a dark brown, he has these round glasses kinda like the ones from the 90s. "I'm Johnny, Johnny Alwin and you are?" It's weird that a guy about the same age as me is talking to me. Wow that really sounds depressing "I'm Jupiter Monroe" he's probably gonna say something stupid like Are you related to Marilyn Monroe or Jupiter like the planet?, but then he says "I like that name Jupiter Monroe not a name you hear every day" it's true I have the most unique name ever. I really do like my name, it's the only thing i like about my self.  "Oh trust me you'll hear it every day from now on, you're going to Ellington High where everyone talks and hates Jupiter Monroe the really short girl who's a fuck up and is fucking psychotic, don't believe them though. There's crazy stories about me like me almost killing Mr. Smith or  I tried to "blow up" the school of course I didn't do any of those things, but who's gonna believe me". He looks at me with those lovely big brown eyes, he smiles looks down at the ground and looks up at me again "I believe you, sounds a bit cheesy doesn't it" he laughs it did sound cheesy, but it was the nicest thing someone had said to me in the longest time. "It's cool I like cheesy" were both laughing at this point, and I love it so much. The last time I felt jocular fond of or characterized by joking;humorous or playful was in the 8th grade when I actually had friends. When freshman year started that's when everything started to change. We hear the bus coming close and we start to get up and let me tell you Johnny Alwin is TALL. Well maybe he just seems so tall cause I'm short although I don't think I'm that short I'm 5'0 feet tall, but according to google that's not the average height for a 16 year old girl. "Wow you're really short" he looks up and down at me "I'm kinda aware of that." We get on the bus and I walk all the way to the back cause no one goes back there, I have no idea why, the back is quiet and it's peaceful. Johnny sits next to me of course cause who the hell is he gonna sit with "what's that?" He points at my red notebook "it's my notebook I write words, lists, how I'm feeling, or if I'm thinking to much I'll write it in here so it'll be on the paper and not in my brain" he takes my notebook and my pen and goes to a blank page and writes
Reasons to stay alive...
he doesn't write any reasons just closes the notebook and hands it back to me "aren't you gonna write reasons?" He shakes his head "nope not until I find one." We sit there with an awkward silence me just looking out the window and Johnny watching me look out the window witch makes me feel even more awkward "you know I have a car I just went on the bus so I could at least know one person" he looks at me and I really can't get over his eyes they're so big and brown "well you know me now, and I think we'll get a long quiet well" I smile at him and he gives me a smile back, a great smile I must add.

4th period English Mr. Darwin
I come late into class every one staring the usual nothing new. "Jupiter you're late" Mr. Darwin says with an annoyed voice, you could say I'm not really Mr. Darwins favorite "sorry sir this school is kinda gigantic and I'm not about to run in the hallways just to get to English"  I go to my seat no where near Harley Carter, Isabella Smith, and Turner Hall. Harley and Isabella are boyfriend and girlfriend "hottest couple" at Ellington High it's actually disgusting. As soon as I sit down I see Johnny running into the room "how can I help you?" Asks Mr. Darwin "um I'm kinda new here, I'm Johnny Alwin" "aha yes newbie find somewhere to settle down" Johnny looks at me and smiles he sits next to me "hi" he whispers "hi" I whisper back. I can already hear Harley snickering with Turner "why the hell is he sitting with psychotic" "kid doesn't know what he's getting himself into." I ignore it something I usually do because in the beginning of sophomore year Harley and Turner were talking shit saying that I'm the reason why Oliver Martinez died let me just say he died in a car accident and I didn't even know the guy. I slammed Harley's face into the locker breaking his nose. I got suspended for a week and precious Harley wouldn't stop talking saying I almost killed him. Please if I was actually psychotic and did all the things they say I would have done it a long time ago. "What's with them?" I wanted to say do you not know that Harley, Turner, and Isabella destroyed my fucking life wich is the reason why I'm so dejected , but all I say is "you're sitting with psychotic jup" he looks at them and looks back at me "you don't look so psychotic to me" I look at him deep in to his eyes "maybes it's because I'm not."