fucked up | taehyung

37. you don't believe me?

*clears throat* hi...

******warning bb's; sadness and mentioned self hate :( if you're easily triggered or triggered in any way then just skip it please i love you so much

p.s.: i love you very much dont' forget that ! i'm always here to talk <3

It's been only a few days since Mia had freaked out and she was feeling highly neglected. It seemed like absolutely no one wanted to talk to her or see her in general. She texted everyone she knew to she if she could talk to any of them, since she isn't feeling the best, and people would blatantly ignore her (aka Taehyung and Jungkook), or tell her that they were busy.

After Taehyung's birthday, she has been feeling out of place and on edge. She was happy that they were in a good place once again but the feeling also scared her very much so.

Taehyung had become so close to her in such little time and that was extremely nerve-wrecking. When she met Yoongi, they were friends first and dated two years afterward. She always believed that she would want to meet someone and know a lot about them before committing to them. But, not knowing Taehyung fully had excited Mia. She felt adrenaline rush through her every time she saw Taehyung. She even knew that, by his reputation, he wasn't good for her and that he was going to most likely break her heart, but she didn't care.

She doesn't really mind that she had fallen for him but a lot weighs on her shoulders. In a selfish way, she doesn't know how to deal with how Taehyung handles his problems. He always runs away. He's afraid of love and doesn't want to accept it and it truly hurts Mia. All she wants to do is to express how much she feels for him but she also wonders if he'll even believe her. Guaranteed, she even questioned herself if she truly loved him but she remembers the elated feeling she has when she simply thinks of him and also the fact that she just wants him to be happy; with or without her.

Since she figures he is afraid of love , she doubts that he does; or basically isn't capable of loving her. It sounds kind of rude but she wouldn't put it past him. Once her dad had left, she has had a hard time letting men in her life. But the relationship with her mom had always made up of all the neglect that she could've felt once growing up. When Yoongi came along, she truly fell in love with him. She prayed and dreamed of being with him for so long. He always reassured her about his love he had for her without her even asking. She felt so much warmth when she was with him and it was so comforting. So when he left, it absolutely broke her. She didn't feel like herself. Maybe that's why she got involved with Taehyung so quickly?...No! Stop it. You're overthinking again, Mia thought.

Sometimes when she was alone, she tried to comprehend how her life changed in very little time. The guy she was in love with just left her when he never gave any signs, or at least thought he didn't, that he didn't want to be with her. She learned to deal with seeing him everyday without telling him she loved him but then Taehyung came along and changed everything.

She did things she never thought she would do. She would've have never thought she would be involved with an affair whatsoever. She's not that type of person. But, she just let herself see past the problem to focus on the silver lining; which was always Taehyung, Taehyung, Taehyung.

He was different than any guy she had met; a fuckboy at first, sure but still...he was still such a good person inside and he just didn't know it.

Mia's love for Taehyung had evolved quickly but it's still growing. He has his faults but so does she. She was uncharacteristically jealous towards someone but she can't help but worry. Taehyung was and still is one of the most handsomest guys in school; he could get any girl he wanted. In conclusion, why would he want to be with her? It's a cliche insecurity, sure, but she has been discouraging herself ever since she found about Nina.