I Wanna Love You Forever

CHAPTER 15: Everywhere

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EVERYWHERE

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“Here.” Marichan handed me an envelope containing eight hundred bucks with a piece of paper. “..from Yuko.”

“She…” I answered pretending I didn’t know.

“Yeah. She was here a while ago. The staff room is off limits so I told her she can’t enter to see you. She did ask me if I could get you to talk to her but I think you really needed a rest so I said I can’t.” She looked at me for a while and tilted her head and shrugging off her shoulders. “I feel like she wants to ask for the reason, so I told her that you’re not in a good condition to talk.”

“Really! And how did she respond to that?”

“Well, she gazed at me with a light smile like she knows something and just nodded her head. And then she asked me for a pen and paper and wrote that letter.” She answered as she points at the piece of paper in my hand. “After she gave me that, she ordered a coffee for take-out and left.”

“Oh.. okay.”

“Hey, sorry I wasn’t able to see you off earlier. What time did you leave? By the way, here’s for the pizza. I can’t have you pay that after all the trouble I gave you. Send me a message soon as you get these.

 

- Yuko”

I sighed reading her message. So I am getting paid for all my stupid efforts of unconditional love, my unnoticed unconditional love. Somehow, I don’t feel good reading her message. Instead, I feel angry that she’s paying me for the food. Although I know that it’s really not a big deal, I can’t shake off the feeling that she’s treating me like someone from outside her circle.

“Hey~ your mind is out again. Is there something wrong with the note?” Marichan called me from the other side of the world.

“Oh.. no. Nothing. Uhh~ you going to the gym later?” I asked her to divert this conversation into something more fun. “I’m coming.”

“Eh? No way! You should go home and have more sleep!” she protested looking at me with a frown. I smiled at her as a sign that I’m already okay although I know she won’t buy it. “No. You’re not going. Stay home.”

“But…” I held all the reasons I have at the back of my head. She needs not to know what’s happening to me. I dive into this mess on my own, so I’ll handle this on my own. It’s just my feelings anyway. “Okay.”

My answer seems to not convince her as her look on me gaze more intensely. I laughed hard seeing how piercing her look on me is. “This is no laughing matter Nyaro. You really need to rest.” I nodded as I think of what else I can do to keep myself busy. Marichan just sighed and shake her head. I get the feeling that she’s accepting defeat over my unvoiced reasoning. “Whatever.” She finally surrendered.