52 Things

Prolouge

Cas's POV

Cas hated rain. He hated the way the individual water droplets fell, streaking the car window. Like sadness was seeping from the sky.

He rested his head against the cool glass of the window of his brother's Volvo and closed his eyes. He didn't want to think about where he was headed, about what was coming. Cas preferred to dwell on the past.

Sometimes that was the only way for him to bear it.

He had always been more of a thinker. Letting himself drown in his memories was somewhat easier than facing the harsh truth of his reality. It was how Cas dealt with things. His way of keeping himself sane. He was doing it right now.

Cas pictured his mother. He thought about the last time he saw her, despite how painful it was. He saw her sleek dark hair bouncing about her shoulders; the clear blue eyes identical to his own.

He could hear her voice in his mind, her words ringing like a bell. They almost brought tears to his eyes.

We'll get through this. Everything's going to be okay. You're going to be okay. I promise you.

Her pretty face had been tear stained, her voice snapping in two as she spoke. She had held him against her, so tight that Cas was sure she'd left a mark. Not just on his skin, but on the frail fabric of his heart.

He'd nodded like he'd believed her. He wished more than anything that he could've. But you couldn't force yourself to hope. No matter how hard you tried. Cas knew that better than anyone.