"Why don't you leave me?" I shouted, trying to mask away the fear that filled inside of me this time.
"Oh Darling I wish I could." He smirked, almost leaning onto me. I could still feel the authority in his husky arrogant voice.
"Don't you fear All...
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With absolutely no tears in my eyes, I stared ahead as the men from our family placed the body in the grave and began to place three handful of soil over it. It was then that it finally registered in my brain, I wasn't even able to say a proper good bye. I Would never be able to see that face again or hear that voice again.
The hollow in my chest kept on growing deeper and deeper. I hadn't shed a single tear since yesterday but now that I finally saw it happening, it felt as though someone was constantly stabbing my heart with a knife.
Women were not allowed in and so we were only watching it from outside. I began to breathe heavily as pain and agony slammed into my heart.
I began to rush in when Nabiha caught my arms. She was already crying but she knew that what I was going through was far more painful. "Please Nabiha let me go. Just once. Just one last time." I began to plead but she embraced me while patting my head. "Shhhhhh! It's fine. You are such a strong girl. Please stop crying. You have been through so much. This shall pass too." For a second it seemed as though she was elder to me and I was the younger one. The grief could not be described. It felt as though a part of me was being detached. I sobbed in her embrace, unable to see the funeral take place. I shut my eyes and finally cried my heart out. I never wanted to question ALLAH's decisions. I have always believed that everything happens for a reason but this time my guards were falling weak.
"Stop crying ya rab! You are not supposed to take tension." She kept on trying her best to calm me down but when heavy footsteps sounded around me, I knew that the funeral was over. Everything was done and nobody could bring back a person from death.
"Please make her understand. She is not allowed to take so much stress." Nabiha said and I knew that she was talking to someone else. Within seconds Nabiha loosened her hold around my shoulder as I felt myself being tugged back into somebody else's embrace. I continued to weep all the more.
"Stop crying please, let's go home." I clutched on to Ahad's arms tightly and let myself drown in it. I rubbed my tear stricken cheeks on his white Kurta while sniffing loudly.
"You will fall ill if you continue to stress so much. I'll take you home now." His words had temporarily managed to distract me from the grief. "No... No.. I need to talk to Humza. Please Just once. I need to tell him that I am ready to go back home." I spoke hurriedly whilst crying but Ahad jolted my shoulders.
"Anaabiya.. He has gone." I looked around to find him no where. I couldn't even spot his car. Pain like never before slammed into my heart. Even he left me. The pain was soon replaced with anger. How could he? He knew I needed him. I jerked Ahad's hand away. "I'll go back on my own. I don't need anyone." I growled taking a step back. "No.. I'll take you." Ahad neared me but I put my hands up to stop him. "I am not a kid Ahad. I can go on my own. I have to bring back my clothes from Fatima's house." Without waiting for him or Nabiha to say a word, I turned around and walked in a known direction. Fatima's house was not far away from the graveyard. I walked past the shops and houses into a known street.
