I'm sorry for everything, for every mistake in my life,
for everything I can't do and never will be able to do. I'm sorry I'm a bother at some times and other times just some pesky ghost that you never notice.
I'm really sorry I exist,
it hurts me and annoys everyone else.
I'm sorry if this hurts anyone out there.
I'm sorry for my soulmate which will never meet me,
I'm sorry for all my friends who will never see me or hear my voice again.
I'm sorry I can't stay with you any longer, I just want it all to end.
And to one friend in particular, I'm sorry I bothered you when I needed you.
You never understood me, never understood why I talked about myself
like I was the biggest failure, you never understood what I felt for you
and you never understood why I hurt myself, why I was broken.
People had hurt me, not just others, I did too.
I said good-bye too many times to too many
of trustworthy friends. I miss them it hurts. I miss her, I miss you.
I want to leave and I want you to understand why. Especially you, you who never understood,
you who thought you never helped me,
you who was heart broken when you had found out what I had done to myself.
I want you to understand why having a 'Good life' doesn't matter.
It's because you can still disappoint everyone, you are still capable of hating yourself
and you can still have depression. Materialistic stuff doesn't matter to a person who has
given up on life, I need you to understand that.
You, dear family, may have given me everything but what you couldn't give me is
my will to live.
