The Blooming Flower (on hold)

Chapter 12

The next day, after a breakfast of chocolate chip pancakes (Todd made three regular for Allison as he insisted the brownies and popcorn last night were enough), the three decided to go on a picnic to Hubbard Park; it was a beautiful day and they did not want to waste it inside. So, in a few hours they packed a bag of turkey sandwiches, a bag of Lay's potato chips (Todd and Allison agreed that she could only have a handful), some apples, and water bottles and headed out the door into the mid July heat.

The park was littered with people, despite it not even being noon yet, standing by the sun-shimmering water and throwing bits of bread for the hungry ducks, preoccupying the limited picnic tables, which caused them to be grateful for Todd's good thinking to bring a picnic blanket, and sitting on their own picnic blankets, enjoying the beautiful, although hot, summer day. The three made a plan to stop at Praline's ice cream parlor, the local ice cream joint in Southington, for a cool refreshing cone after lunch. (Todd knew it was hot and it would be unfair for Allison to have to watch as he and his sister chowed down on their cones while she was left empty-handed.

After parking the car, they searched and found a perfect spot to set up their picnic, on top of a hill under a shady tree.

As they began unpacking the bag, something caught Allison's eye and she stopped unpacking the food to watch a girl about her age carrying a baby, who looked to be about two years old, in her arms as a boy around the same age as the girl carried a blanket and picnic bag over his shoulder. The baby was adorable, dressed in a little baby pink sun dress and tiny white sandals with flowers splayed on the front by her toes. She had the most striking blue eyes Allison had ever seen and her blonde hair shone in the summer sunshine.

As she watched the couple and their baby as they set their picnic blanket down on the grass only a few feet from where she, Todd and Liz sat, she imagined herself and Todd with their baby on a sunny summer day like today, enjoying the sun as a family. Family. Allison played that word in her head over and over again, liking the sound of it. But then, her stomach sank as she remembered that she, Todd, and their baby would not be a family, at least not like that couple and their baby. No, their child would have other parents who would take care of him but she and Todd would definitely still have a relationship with their baby; that would be the only way Allison could cope with her baby being taken away. So, in a way they would be a family, a family who didn't eat dinner all together every night, who didn't go on family outings like this. Todd and Allison wouldn't be parents who got to witness their baby's first steps or first words, his first time using the potty like a big boy (or girl). Sure, they would get notified and, if they were lucky, his adoptive parents would have their video camera handy as he took those first steps or said "mama" for the first time. Allison began to tear up as she thought about how it wouldn't be her he would be calling Mama, but another woman, another older woman more fit to be his mother.

Allison suddenly began to hate that girl who sat feet from her, enjoying this beautiful summer day with her daughter and boyfriend. Why was she able to keep her baby and live a happy life as a family with them? Where was she getting the money to support her family? As she asked these questions in her mind, the anger and jealousy began to rise and bubble up inside of her.

Suddenly, she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned to see Todd looking at the family. He looked into her eyes, sorrow filling them as he read Allison's mind, most likely having the same thoughts as he watched them. His desire to be a father like that guy became apparent. Allison wondered if the desire was always there or if it just now emerged as he observed the happy family who were no older than Allison and him.

"Guys, what's wrong?" Liz asked as she chowed down on some potato chips. Her gaze followed theirs and she spotted the couple who was now smiling at their daughter as she munched on some animal crackers. She crawled closer to the two of them, wrapping them in a hug from behind. Allison and Todd turned to face her and they all embraced in a group hug.