All Mine

Ayumu Yamashita - small and delicate, especially for a fifteen year old. His eyes are orange, which is a very unusual color. He's very pale, like a porcelain doll. He seems so fragile, so fragile...

I want him.

He notices I'm staring at him, but rather then walking away, he approaches me with a smile. I notice that he wears the scarf I gave him, still. It's still snow-white, which means he still takes very good care of it. How I long to touch the rope burn hidden under that scarf, see if he still winces like when I touched it when it was a fresh wound.

"...Sadao, are you listening?" He asks, raising an eyebrow. I pat his head, watching him flinch as I do so. I want him to flinch more, flinch only because I made him do that. "Sorry," I say, smiling. "I was only thinking." Ayumu's smile returns, and I remember how much I wish he would only smile for me. "Would you like me to walk you home today?" I ask jokingly. He rolls his eyes and says, "I live next door to you, idiot." I laugh, we start walking, and I take his hand in mine, watching and feeling him tense up as my hand took his.

This only made me want him more.

The next afternoon, at school, I can't help but stare at Ayumu more - and today I have a good reason. We have a new student, but I didn't pay attention to his name. The new student seemed to attach himself to Ayumu.

It doesn't appear he knows that Ayumu is mine.

I approach Ayumu and the new student, who appear to be talking and getting along. How dare he talk to my Ayumu so freely? He obviously doesn't understand that he shouldn't be aloud to talk to Ayumu when I'm not around, but he's new, so I decide to cut him some slack. "Hello, Ayumu!" I say, smiling at him. "How's your afternoon going?" He smiles back at me and says, "Hello, Sadao. My afternoon is going fine - Oh! This is my new friend... Ah, what was your name again?" He tells Ayumu his name once more, and I don't like the way he looks at Ayumu.

He looks at Ayumu as if he loves him. He has to be taught a lesson.

Ayumu and the new student spend a few days together, and now they really are getting along. The new student is all Ayumu talks about. The new student has consumed Ayumu's heart, and I decide that I must get it back. After the bell rings at the end of the day, Ayumu approaches my desk and says, "Hey, Sadao, are we walking home together today?" I shake my head and notice his disappointed look. So I haven't totally lost him to the new student, I think. "I have to do something after school today, but I promise I'll come to your house right after." I say to him. His smile returns and he bids me farewell before exiting. This day, I follow the new student home. Before he can even go near his house, I stop him. Permanently.

The next day at school, the new student doesn't show up. Then the next day, and the next day, and the next, he doesn't show up. Ayumu grows worried, but I calm him down, taking his mind off the new student and keeping his heart to me.

By the time the new student is publically announced as dead, Ayumu has mostly forgotten about him. I thought this would satisfy me, but I notice that not only girls, but some boys tend to stare at him, examining his feminine, small body in ways I should only be doing. I want to keep Ayumu to myself, but I wonder how? I wonder...

And then it comes to me.

A month later, the police are still searching for Ayumu's body. I work my hardest to keep him from decomposing, and every part of his body is still intact, even after a month. Now I'm satisfied, because Ayumu is all mine.

Nobody would ever think to check my closet, after all.