My loneliness provided me with a sea of disparities.
My only friends who ever seemed to comfort me were alcohol & ganja.
Though I see myself surrounded by others I've never felt more alone than when we'd understand each other.
Same conflicts and mind set, we want love, we want acceptance but put on a fuck off type of front to hault our depression.
It's easier to not feel, it's beautiful to not care, it's lonesome out there when you have no one with who you can share your life.
Keeping your mind sealed up tight leads to screams in your mind.
What about the future, what will tomorrow bring? The question would make my ears ring and every time I would pop it my mind would lock it. That was my thought for days, feeling alone with no future in sight curled up staring at walls knowing that everyone else is having the time of their lives.
Happiness does not lie in a bottle or blunt, it does not cure or detain the moving train fueled by pain but instead amplifies the feelings you keep retrained in your brain.
You gotta let it out and seek help for yourself. It's not a question of tomorrow but instead what can I do for myself.
