Single Parent-trip \\ Cashton

Chapter 19

Calum was pretty confident with his guess, of where he could possibly find Ashton. It just made sense and even if he hadn't told Michael and thus hadn't gotten advice whether or not it was a good idea, Calum's confidence didn't waver. After all, it had nature, it was quiet and most likely only the locals knew of its existence.

Luckily for Calum, it was only a ten minute walk from the hotel, which turned even shorter since Calum ended up jogging. He had felt the adrenaline kick in and he was getting excited, because it was much like a book or a series. Even if there hadn't been all that much drama, it still felt like something made up. Him falling for the travel guide and now chasing him, in the hopes to make things better.

The odd shaped rocks were the first thing Calum noticed when approaching, his eyes already searching the small beach for a certain figure. Of course, he knew Ashton wouldn't make it that easy. He knew the travel guide a little by now and he wouldn't just sit down in the first spot he'd pass. He would probably have ended up walking along the beach a little. Enjoying the soft breeze and the water.

And Calum was right, having pulled off his flip-flops and walked a little further, through the sand. He spotted Ashton sitting somewhat out of sight, near the water and with his legs pulled up. His arms were around his legs almost loosely, fingers entwined and thumbs twiddling a little. As if he was mindlessly moving them while thinking.

When Calum moved closer, he saw Ashton's eyes were locked on the ocean, while his lips were parted lightly and his chest moved up and down with somewhat heavy breaths. And when Calum ended up next to Ashton, in the sand, he was a little surprise to see a tear-track on Ashton's cheek. Though no fresh tears, to his relief.

Ashton noticed Calum, how he sat down next to him and looked at the ocean too, for a bit. But he didn't respond. He kept quiet as well and Calum knew he wouldn't start the conversation anyway. He had to and he had to apologise as well, probably. Even if in his mind, he didn't have anything to apologise for. Maybe the way he took Ashton by surprise, but he couldn't exactly have given Ashton more of a heads up.

"I'm sorry if that was, um... somewhat... yeah." Calum looked down at the sand at his feet, poking his finger in it and slowly tracing a random pattern. Ashton's eyes moved down to follow Calum's finger, but he didn't speak. He still kept quiet and that made Calum feel a little awkward. But he was quite set on fixing this -whatever this was exactly. "I just- I don't know how to make it clear that I really, really like you. It's not just a crush and I want to know if you see any possibilities in this. Or if I just need to give up all hope, because if I do, please just say so."

It took a moment, but Ashton then let out a quiet sigh, finally turning his head and meeting Calum's eyes. Ashton's eyes weren't red, so he hadn't cried much, but it still saddened Calum to see Ashton this troubled. Especially because of him. "It's just that... I think too much about everything."

Calum titled his head a little, taking the man in and wondering what he meant exactly, but not wanting to question it. He wanted to know, but he didn't want to scare Ashton away again. He wanted to let the man tell himself.

"I guess I've been hanging onto my past a lot, even if I've tried to move on by doing what I do now. I'm still scared that it will repeat itself. And that makes me scared to fall for someone. As stupid as it may sound." Ashton told the other, now avoiding his eyes. His past obviously bothered him, which was another thing that kind of saddened Calum. It must have been something big, for Ashton to still be bothered by it, Calum figured.

The dark haired male wanted to take Ashton's hand, already reaching for it, before pulling back as he realised that might make Ashton uncomfortable. "It's not stupid. Obviously it was left a scar and scars don't just fade. They can be covered and forgotten, but at the end of the day, they're still there. It's normal to look at them and realise what has happened had an impact. We're all human after all."