I'm alright

1/2

Casper opened his eyes groggily. Faint morning light shone through the window, slowly banishing the darkness his room was enveloped in. With a groan he turned on his back, away from the light, and looked at the clock on the nightstand. The green numbers glowed at him angrily, making him close his eyes. It seemed like they burned itself into his retinas as even with his eyes tightly shut, he could still see "4:37AM" clearly. Covering his head with the duvet, he tried to fall back asleep. Time dragged on but Casper still couldn't sleep. The insides of his wrists itched, denying him rest. He rubbed them against the sheets but it only made the itching turn into a dull pain.

"What the..."

He brought his hands before his eyes and looked at his wrists. There were red lines running across them. Casper squinted in disbelief. Reaching out, he turned on the night lamp and examined his wrists in a better light. The lines looked suspiciously like cut marks. Muttering under his breath, he ran his fingers over the marks, confirming their existence. Then his eyes widened in panic as realisation struck him.

"My soulmate... is cutting themselves?"

Casper shot out of his bed and started searching for clothes to put on but then he stopped. He didn't know who his soulmate was. Sliding against the wardrobe, he sat on the floor. It was so frustrating, knowing that someone destined for you were hurting themselves. Casper punched the floorboards in exasperation. Then he froze. He should avoid hurting himself so that his soulmate wouldn't be in unnecessary pain.

Slowly getting up, Casper trudged to his bedside drawer and pulled out an elastic bandage. He grabbed some clothes as well and left for the bathroom to take a shower. After finding out about his soulmate's condition he wouldn't be able to sleep so he might as well start his day a bit earlier.

***

After showering and carefully wrapping his wrists up, Casper went to the kitchen. He grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, chugged half of it down almost instantly and then proceeded to make dumplings for breakfast. His mind was still focused on the person destined for him though. Casper couldn't stop worrying. What was bothering his soulmate so much that they hurt themselves? A sudden longing and want to help overcame him. He wants to know who his soulmate is. He wants to know why they're doing this horrible thing. He wants to know them. He wants to help.

Lost in thought, Casper didn't realise he made too many dumplings. For a moment he just stared at them in astonishment but then decided to fry some for himself and put the uncooked ones in the fridge for his band members. With a plate of dumplings in hand, he returned to his room and sat at the desk. The computer made a quiet whirring noise when Casper turned it on. It was still early so he plugged in his headphones and decided to compose something, just to take his mind off of things.

It proved to be a poor distraction, however, because he found his thoughts circulating around the mysterious person – his soulmate. It was a bittersweet feeling. On the one hand, he was happy that he finally knew for sure that somewhere in this world there is a person who is destined for him. On the other hand, this same person hurts themselves and he has no means to stop this self-abuse. There are probably millions of people who cut themselves, finding this one among all of them is like looking for a needle in a haystack, a needle that can suddenly move to a different city, country or continent. Not to mention, even if he somehow managed to reach all of these people, there was no guarantee that he'd be able to communicate with them.

With a frustrated sigh Casper turned off the computer. He put the headphones somewhere on his desk, uncaringly, and threw himself on the bed. Lying on his back, he covered his eyes with the crook of his right arm. His troubling thoughts drained him and he eventually managed to drift into an uneasy sleep.