Makeup remover wipes S.M.

Chapter 22

I can't give him hugs any more, and I'm just so afraid of hurting him or messing with that stupid chemo thing I barely touch him. "Good morning," he smiles I lay next to him, a healthy distance away. I don't sleep in here, I sleep in the room next door but I lay with him when he goes to bed and I'm always here before he wakes up.

"Morning beautiful," I smile at him brushing my hands through his hair. Yesterday was his tenth chemo appointment and he's loosing his fluffy locks quickly. Every brush of my fingers collects more and more hair so I just stop making him sigh. It's the most contact he's gotten from me since his first chemo appointment. I do still give him constant kisses and I hope my love is obvious, through all that I try to do for him, he just means too much to me. If anything happens to him or that stupid chemo thing I'd feel responsible so I do everything and I'm ok with it. He's not though, the other day he cried when I carried Mercy up the stairs. She's only a little taller than me, so he wasn't crying about the struggle, simply that he wasn't to one doing it for our baby girl. I fell asleep the other day on the couch, he tried to take me up but I woke up when his arms slid underneath me. He cried than too but I was half asleep and to out of it to help her him.

"Sleep well?" The calloused thumb of my lover hits my cheek and he smiles. I grab his hand smiling at it, every single line, I can see one of our children in his hands. He stares down at me looking the same way he did on our wedding night, that same perfect smile, the same look. I really hope things go well for him. He deserves that much, he didn't deserve any of it but he got it and in the place of being angry we're happy while we try to spend every minute we can with our loved one.

"Mhm, how about you?" I purr making him smile. He doesn't know yet but today we're going to adopt a kitten Angelina really wants one and he told her she could but then all of this happened and it made everyone really sad but she wants to cheer them up and Shawn's always talking about cats. She knows that he wants one too so she asked if we could get one and I said that we'd go today. She's such a sweet little girl.

"Well I was alone all night," he rolls his eyes and I giggle. "Again." He falls against the bed very exaggeratedly. I have too much fears and doubts I worry too much and he's so laid back, he doesn't care as much. "Look," he takes his shirt off showing me the missing chemo thing. "They took it off yesterday because the surgery is so soon, I forgot to tell you." He mumbles.

"You jerk," I hit his shoulder. "I spent another sleepless night in the spare room because of this." He giggles at my growl. "I'll sleep in here tonight baby, and I'll sleep with you after the surgery too," I run my hands over his head collecting more and more hair in my fingers. I start to pull my hand away but he grabs my wrist.

"Don't ever stop doing that? Please?" He's said multiple times he doesn't want what's happening to change anything but it has and he can't ignore it. There are few things it hasn't changed and a lot of things I'm doing my best to keep normal but it doesn't always work.

"What happens if I pull all of your hair out and there's nothing left?" I raise an eyebrow.

"Than I'll do it to you, of maybe I'll make a wig with all of the hair you've been saving. " he rolls his eyes at the clumps of hair that lay against my pillow.

"It's not there on purpose." I giggle pulling my hand from his hair and laying against his shoulder. 

"Yet you keep it there anyways, why?" He raises an eyebrow. "Do you think it's attractive?"

-

"Look at her?" Shawn holds a kitten with Angelina right next to him giving me the same pleading look. "Can we get her, please?" He pouts at me. Staring at the puppy dog eyes my daughter gives and the look of worry that washes off of my husbands face I nod even though I've already told the other kids they could get their cat. So I guess we'll have two, this is an attempt to make my teddy bear happy again so we're getting the cat he wants regardless of what I've already promised.

"Is daddy getting a kitten too?" CJ smiles walking the kitten the others wanted on a leash.

"Yeah this kitten is gonna be daddy and Angie's." I smile and he nods.

"Mama wants a bird," Shawn giggles and I roll my eyes. "Should we get mama a bird?" He looks towards the grey parrot I've been eyeing.

"Yeah, mama should get something too," he nods very sternly and I roll my eyes.

"I don't need anything but you guys," I ruffle his hair while they put a leash on Angelina's kitty.

"We're getting you a bird," Shawn smiles while the other kids return with a shopping cart full of the necessities for their cats. "Mamas getting a bird," he smiles running his hands over our boys' heads. He looses himself in the moment staring down at our confused child.

"Kaiden be nice," I roll my eyes at the dirty look his shoots his ill father.

"It's fine, I know they hate it." He sighs walking to collect things for the bird. I sigh at his sadness but make no further comment. He'd be mad if I did, and I'd rather not meddle.