Forever and Always

I was sitting at the table in the café where we were supposed to meet. The hours were dragging on and I was getting worried. He should be here, he should have called at least. Leaning back in our booth Stacy, a waitress me and Sam had got to know over the last few years, came over with a concerned look on her face.

“Still not here?” She asked me. I simply shook my head. Giving me a sad smile she placed her hand on mine. “I remember back two years ago, you must have been what? Sixteen. And he got down on his knee and said…”

“I want you forever, forever and always. Through the good and the bad and the ugly.” I finished for her, remembering the way he had looked at me and how I had nearly cried when I kissed him. Just as I said it my phone rang. The brittle sound seeming to crack my ice filled veins.

The number wasn’t recognised but I answered it anyway. As I sat and listened to the person on the other end of the phone Stacy walked away. My face got paler, tears welled up in my eyes and in a mad dash of panic I dropped my phone onto the seat. Not bothering to pick it up or pay for the coffee I’d had I rushed out of the café. Slamming the door of my car so hard everyone in the parking lot turned to look my way.

Driving over twice the speed limit I rushed to the hospital. Hoping, hoping it would be ok.

Why hadn’t I made him get the dam car fixed? Why did it have to break when he went round that sharp bend? He had said fixing it himself made it more personal, gave it sentimental value. But no, he was in hospital, all because of the dam car, the dam car I brought him!

Reaching the hospital I spluttered to the nurse on duty, “Please, Sam, Sam Jason’s room, where…” thankfully she guided me down the million halls in a seemingly never ending maze to his room. Looking in through the glass I can see the tube’s connecting him, hear the beep’s that were keeping him alive and although I tried to look calm I couldn’t.

Sitting by his bedside I took his hand in mine, he’s unconscious. “Miss, are you family,” The doctor ask’s me in the neutral voice doctors always use.

“No, but he doesn’t have anyone else.” I tell him, tear’s falling down my face and on to Sam’s limp hand. I think about his family, they all moved away last year. But he stayed, he stayed for me.

It’s then that the doctor tell’s me he has only hours to live.

Just a few months ago we’d visited his family. While they had all be outside in the summer heat we’d been indoors, snuggled up on the sofa together. “I wish I lived in the country, it’s so nice, so peaceful.” I had sighed and snuggled into his chest more. “It would be great for writing. Can you imagine it.”

“You just wait,” I remember him saying, “Just wait until you’ve finished collage and we’ll buy a house just like this. In the country, with horses and dogs and whatever animals you want. We’ll run it as some kind of business and I’ll do my job on a computer most days so I can work at home while you work on those books you want to write.”

Suddenly I feel a squeeze on my hand. Looking up I see his face, covered in the oxygen mask I can see him smiling through it. “God Lizzie don’t look so sad, think about what you’ll be like if one of our kids every get’s hurt.”

I smile, he’s making light of the situation, hoping I don’t panic because we both know what’s happening. He’s dieing. We wont have kids because he’s dieing. “What about you then, I’ll need you to keep me calm.”

“Lizzie you know I’m not going to be here for much longer...” He started to say but I stopped him.

“Don’t say that. Your strong, you’ll make it through. And we’ll have that house we always wanted and the kids and the dog. And we’ll grow old together, me and you. Forever and always was what you said wasn’t it, forever and always.” I didn’t want him to go, I needed him. We were meant to be together, forever.

 Giving me a small smile he said in a small voice, “Lizzie, please. Before I go, will you marry me?”

I sobbed, put me head on his chest and sobbed. “I love you, of course I’ll marry you.” How could I not?

As I said that a nurse came in the room. Smiling down at us she went back out and just minuets later came back in with a Chaplin. Smiling down at us with what must have been tears in his eyes, he began to say a few verses but even though the room seemed crowded now all we saw was each other.

We borrowed some rings, from the couple next door and everybody was smiling as my tears fell to the floor. I held his hand tight, fearing to let go. And as he placed the ring on my finger I realised that his voice seemed just a little to low and that the beep’s were getting to slow.

Looking at me he gave a weak smiled and placing my ring hand close to his mouth said in a near whisper “I will love you forever, forever and always. Please just remember, even if I’m not there. I’ll always love you, forever and always.”

…

 Based on the song Forever and Always by Parachute