I can feel me losing myself
I'm slipping away as if a current has knocked me off of my feet and into the river
I'm trying to gather my strength and standfast
Usually I hold on to the boulder
That strong rock I always see, always there
But even it too is gone
It has been worn down to a pebble
I have nothing to latch onto
The tree branch is too far away
The stump has all the bark stripped from it
The grass is too thin and fragile
I'm losing myself
My life slipping through my fingers
Someone help me!
Please?!
Don't you see that I'm drowning,
Suffocating as the water fills my lungs?
Am I that insignificant?
Soon my body will become one with the water
Soon my legs will stop kicking
Soon...my arms will stop trying to grasp for a helping hand
And then
Just as I realize there is no hope
They grab my ankle
Dragging me to what I think is safety
Only to have my body begin to feel the pain of my stomach being cut into with the dullest of scalpels
Trying to get rid of the many butterflies that have hatched there
They tell me, “You don't deserve these. My name is not the boulder you latch onto.
My voice is not the painting to soothe your terrors. You have the wrong muse.”
And then, they say what I pray had a different meaning
I. Love. You.
“How can you say that?
How can you let me fall into the river and expect me not to feel this way?!?
After you let me flow on for miles, thinking this is how I was supposed to be?
Give me an answer!”
They don't. They only push me back into the rushing rapids…. Watching my soulless body Become one with the never ending rush of liquid.
Promising to catch me after another few miles.
