Sometimes, when I am far away from home, I get anxious.
Of course, the anxiety is mostly anticipatory anxiety, so I get more nervous about getting there than I do at the actual place I am. Normally, it starts at the beginning of the trip - whether on a bus, plane, or even in a car trip. In the middle of the trip, depending on length, I normally relax and have a good time. By the end, I am ready to get off and go to the place I've been traveling too,
But let's say the trip is long. A long, 22-24 hour bus ride is a great example.
I'm happy to be where I am, but as the time slowly stats to pass, I become more anxious and impatient, I want to get out, get fresh air, stretch and get the feeling back in my legs. Long distance travel is a bit difficult for me, and I try very hard to pull through, I did a 13 hour car ride once - I was able to make it, but just barely.
The boy who sleeps next to me as I write this is calm. I'm lucky to have him by my side. And yet, as I attempt to contain future anxiety, I'm afraid I'll scare him. I don't know who to turn to other than my parents sometimes, and I almost think that It's good that they have come along.
Because I am enduring that long bus ride now.
At times, I wonder if taking this trip was really worth it. Am I really spending time with the ones I wan to be with? Will I get enough sleep, or even be able to sleep? Will this rain pass soon that we travel through?
Can we just turn around and go home? I'm afraid to be so far away from home.
