Monster

A/N: Just to clear this up, this is set post reveal. The focus of this story is not the reveal but the aftermath. There were a lot of ways this could go and I've read a lot of different fanfics where Merlin reveals his magic and I wanted to write one that was slightly different. In all the different stories that I've read Merlin ALWAYS forgives Arthur. No matter how angry he got, he would always forgives him. Like I said, I wanted this story to be different. so BE WARNED because this story won't have a happy ending. There will be no Merthur bromantic or otherwise because, in my mind, Merlin is too good for Arthur and he doesn't deserve him. Just once I wanted Merlin to realise that.

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"You're a monster"

"Only since I met you"

"And just what is that supposed to mean"

"It means that's what you do. That's what you all do. It's what Every single goddamn Pendragon does. You take innocent people and make them into monsters."

"How could--"

"What? How could I say that? Because it's TRUE. I was nothing more than an innocent farm boy from a small village before I met you. I used my magic My goddamn BIRTHRIGHT to help people. I used it to help crops grow and to help cows birth easier and to heal the sick and the wounded. But people didn't see that. All they saw was the "monster" that your family made me out to be, with the freaky gold eyes that could move objects before he could talk. Do you know I was on almost constant house arrest? My mother wouldn't let me leave the house because she was scared. Not of me. FOR me. Because every time I left there'd be name calling. People giving me dirty looks. Beatings. Do you know I was 13 when I was first raped?!"

"Wh--"

"Yeah that's right sire. FIRST raped. As in the FIRST time that it happened. People always called me sick and wrong but they were the sick ones. The would use me and then leave me to die. But I didn't die. I couldn't. My magic would heal me whether I wanted it to or not. So they'd share me around. Tell everyone I was a slut and take me out into the middle of the woods and have their way with me."

"But why didn't you-?"

"Leave? I couldn't. I wouldn't ever leave my mother behind like that. Especially since she didn't-doesn't know what was happening."

"No I meant why didn't you use your... magic?"

"Because I didn't want to hurt them."

"HURT THEM?!! MERLIN THEY WERE RAPING YOU!! HOW LONG WAS IT GOING ON FOR?!"

"That's not the only reason sire. And don't pretend like you care. I'm an "evil sorcerer, remember?. Anyway, I knew that if I used my magic against them that'd make me the monster they said I was. And as to you're other question it happened right up until the night before I left for Camelot."

"But... You were eighteen..."

"Yes."

"5 years Merlin. FIVE WHOLE YEARS IT WENT ON AND YOU DIDN'T THINK TO TELL ME?!!"

"You didn't need to know. Anyway that's not the point."

"NOT THE PO---"

"The point is. The reason that the only sorcerers, of which I am not considering I'm a warlock, thank-you very much, you encounter are evil is because you make them that way."