The Drug In Me Is You ( A Ronnie Radke Love Story)

Chapter 33: Self Destruct Personality

Julia’s POV

I woke up and looked at the empty space next to me. I sighed and got ready for the day. Last night’s memory still imprinted in my brain. I went downstairs and thank god no one is awake. I left a note and headed to the doctors. They called me in and I relaxed. “Why do you think there is something wrong with your baby?” the nurse asked. I then explained my medical condition instead of what Ronnie did. I sat there as she waved the wand around my stomach. “Your baby is fine and healthy. Have a nice day.” The nurse said. I nodded and headed back to Russell’s. I pulled in the driveway and sat in the car. I took in a deep breath and headed inside. Willow came running over. “Mommy, quickly come to the bathroom. Daddy locked himself in there this morning and hasn’t come out plus there is blood on the floor.” She said. “Where are your uncle and grandpa?” I asked. “They went to work.” She said. “Go to mommy’s parents now and tell them to watch you for me because it is very important.” I said. She nodded and ran out of the house. “Ronnie, I need you to open up the door.” I said. There was no answer. “Ronnie, Iris and I are fine. Please baby, open the door.” I said. Still no answer. I banged on the door. “RONALD JOSEPH OPEN THIS DOOR!” I screamed. I finally got the door down and saw Ronnie passed out and blood everywhere. I sat him up and stopped the bleeding. I grabbed the first aid kit from under the bed when we were kids and started stitching up his wrists. “Baby, you need to wake up. Iris and Willow need their daddy.” I whispered cleaning him up. “I need you Ronnie. I am fine. I know you didn’t mean to hurt me. I love you more than anything.” I said. I kissed him softly. “I can’t ever forgive myself for hurting you.” He said weakly. “Ronnie, you just need to get your anger under control. I know you can baby.” I said moving his hair out of his face. He smiled weakly. “You gave Willow quite a scare. I am going to get her but first you need to get into the bed.” I said. He nodded. I helped him up and tucked him into bed. I then cleaned up the bathroom and put away the first aid kit. I walked into the bedroom and found Ronnie crying again. “Ronnie, look at me honey.” I said placing my hand on his cheek. “I am such a fuck up.” He said. “Ya but you’re my fuck up.” I said kissing him. I hugged him tightly as he cried. He soon felt better and I went to get Willow. I told my parents I would explain everything tomorrow. I went up to my room and thanked Peyton for watching Willow. We headed home and Willow ran straight for Ronnie. “I am so sorry for scaring you baby. Daddy is extremely stupid and is going to get himself under control. I promise.” Ronnie told her. “I love you daddy.” She said cuddling into him. I smiled and sat with them on the bed. “So why were you and Matt fighting last night?” I asked. “Matt likes your sister.” He said. “And that is bad because?” I asked. “I don’t really know.” He said. I rolled my eyes and kissed his head. “Just let Matt ask her out. She could use some happiness in her life.” I said. “Okay.” Ronnie said. I laughed and tucked my head under his shoulder and turned on a movie for us to watch. Willow snuggled in between us and we laid there watching The Little Mermaid on Disney Channel which then turned into Hannah Montana reruns. Willow got up and started dancing and singing along with the show. We smiled and watched her. “Daddy, can I be a singer?” she asked. “Sure baby, you have beautiful voice.” He said. She squealed and hugged him tightly. Matt and Russell got home and I sent Matt up to Ronnie. Peyton came by asking if her and Willow could go get ice cream. I nodded and they ran off. I collapsed on the couch with my head in my hands. Tears slowly made their way out of my eyes. “Julia, what happened?” Russell asked rubbing my back. “He hurt himself. He hurt himself because he hurt Iris and me. I don’t know what to do Russell.” I said. “Julia, you both will get through this. I promise you. Try talking to him about going to therapy because I remember him talking about it last night after what happened.” He said. I nodded and thanked him. Matt came back downstairs with Ronnie and they were laughing and smiling. I smiled and wiped away my tears. Ronnie walked over and kissed me softly. “I am so lucky to have you in my life.” He said. I kissed him back. “Hey dad, could you watch Willow tonight so I can take my wife out tonight?” Ronnie asked. “Sure thing, I will show her how to use a gun.” My eyes then popped out of my skull. “Kidding.” He said. I let out a breath of relief and smiled. I head upstairs to get ready for our date. I curled my hair and stuck a pink flower clip in the back while pinning back the top layer. I slipped my blank camisole over my baby bump and pulled on my skinny jeans. I wrapped a pink scarf around my neck and pulled on my black ankle booties. I slipped on some silver bangles and my rings. I looked at my reflection content on how I looked and headed downstairs.

Ronnie’s POV

I shook nervously as I fixed my hair. I mean I know Julia and I are married now but still it make me nervous taking her out. I heard her heels clicking down the stairs. I looked up and I was stunned by how she looked. She always looks so beautiful. “You look so beautiful, Mrs. Radke.” I said. “You look very handsome yourself, Mr. Radke.” She said. “Don’t wait up.” I yelled to my dad and brother. I opened the car door and she slid into the seat. I shut the door and got in the car. I started it up and headed off to my surprise for Julia. We pulled up to the old abandoned drive in that was actually still in great shape. I led her out to the middle of the field. I set up a blanket and the dinner I packed for us. I lit a candle and play music from the car’s stereo. “Ronnie this is amazing.” She said smiling. “I wanted to make us feel young again before Iris comes. We won’t be able to go as much so I thought let’s have fun now while we are here with family to watch Willow.” I said. “Well I love the idea.” She said kissing me. I smiled and kissed her back. “So we have about four months left.” I said. “I know. I can’t wait for her to get here.” She said rubbing her tummy. After we finished eating I walked up to the movie booth and put Letters to Juliet in. I covered Julia and me with a blanket. I wrapped my arm around her shoulders and she rested her head against mine. Julia ended up falling asleep near the end of the movie. I picked her up and placed her in the car carefully. I picked up the basket and blanket. I grabbed the movie and drove us home. I carried Julia inside and changed her into her pjs. I changed into mine and went into Willow’s room. She was fast asleep. I smiled and kissed her forehead. I sat in bed next to Julia and thought of lyrics. I started messing around with all the words jumbled in my brain. After about two hours, I looked at the paper and smiled with what I wrote. I went to the top of the paper and wrote Self-Destruct Personality. I tucked it away in my bag and wrapped my arms around Julia. I soon fell asleep to the sound of her heart beating.

Julia's outfit on the side