i. the sea
i learn to swallow the words my mom utters
the way i swallow the meals she cooks.
she is my mother, and her words are
the truth.
i am too young to know
that parents
can lie,
that parents
aren't the end all be all,
that parents
can be two of your biggest critics
and worst enemies
(you being the biggest critic and worst enemy).
too soon, i am
sinking.
no one throws me a life raft,
because i don't tell anyone
that i am drowning.
instead, i've accommodated and adapted
to the lack of air underwater.
the moment i rise up
is the moment i discover
the power i possess.
this is a sea of my own fashioning,
and i am a god.
i am the sole manipulator
of these waters.
this is my own body.
i am the one
with the control.
ii. space
i learn
that i am endless depths,
that i am more
than the body that holds me.
my mom's comments
and my cousin's comments
no longer affect me
the way they used to.
i am lost
in my own self.
i start explorations
to find out more about
the galaxies and stars
i hold within.
i am rebirth,
a universe reborn,
the Big Bang.
i am endless creation,
i am new life taking shape,
i am stars forming and dying.
i am an astronaut
discovering the vast area
of my mind.
iii. a meadow
i bloom,
and i am
warmth.
i shower my body
with positivity,
with praise,
with sunshine.
some days it
rains,
and clouds are pouring
endlessly,
but all that ever does
is help me
grow.
i am strong,
and my body is my home.
i am my own sunshine,
and i will not let the storms
wreck this land.
iv. a mountain
i am
immovable.
i have settled,
and learned to appreciate
my body.
no longer am i chiseling away
at what i have.
i am finding hidden wealths of treasure
in my depths.
i am loving and appreciating
the way my arms move,
the way my legs move,
my tummy,
my feet.
people can throw stones
but they don't realise
i am made from the very stones
they threw.
you can cause me to fortify,
but it's very hard
it cause me to
break.
v. a cavern
deep inside my body
is where i am houesd.
past the outside,
past the darkness,
in a place
where the walls glow
and water flows
freely.
this feels like a place where i
belong,
and i'm done
with constantly hating and criticising
the thing that allows me to
live,
and i'm done
with constantly wishing for
more,
for something
different.
i am surrounding myself
with love and appreciation,
my love, my warmth, my glowing
sanctuary.
light
defeats dark,
and i will not let the darkness
eat away at me.
i am my own light,
and darkness
will not break
this body.
