My lover(sequel to My Host; namjin)

Namjoon

       I greet Hoseok at the gates at the airport and help him take his bags to my car. We make small talk-avoiding the mostly painfully obvious subject I really want to talk about-while I drive us to my apartment. I throw his bags in my guest room as he looks around, admiring the artwork I've acquired mostly in thanks to Wheein.
     She loves art while I could really care less. She helped me decorate my place to kill her boredom. I just let her do whatever while I work. I trust her around my stuff. Hoseok plops down on my sofa and sighs. I know he's been struggling lately and feel for him but he just won't open up. It's not my place to force him however.
     "When are we going to the studio?" He asks as we watch tv.
     "Um, tomorrow morning. The trainee will be there around noon so that gives us time to get you settled in and everything." I say and he nods.
      "Sounds good. Well, the plane ride kinda wiped me out so I'm gonna head to bed." He mutters and I let him go to sleep. I make a snack before turning in myself and climbing into bed. I scroll through my phone contacts like every night and pause on the one name I want to call so bad it kills me.
     Jinnie <3
     Tears cloud my eyes and I blink them away, ignoring the constant never ending pang in my chest. I fucked up. I know I did. I should have heard him out. I should have been pissed, let my anger out then made hot make up sex with him. But no. I had to be an insensitive insecure dick.
      No way would he even want to speak to me now. I need him back in my life but what if it's too late? This was so stupid. I'm so fucking stupid! I scroll down to Yoongi's number instead and dial. Maybe I'll hear his voice in the background. It'll be something at least not that a coward like me deserves it.
      "Joon-ah, you know what time it is?" He huffs and I glance over feeling stupid. Right. Time difference. Shit.
       "Ah, I'm sorry. Just wanted to know how everything is..." I face palm myself like the true idiot I am.
       He scoffs. "You mean you want to know how Jin is, right? I honestly don't know. He left two days ago." He sighs. My heart stops at his words.
        "What do you mean 'left'?" I demand.
        "I mean he packed his bags, left Jimin and I the deed to this house and bid us farewell. He's gone, Joon. You lost your chance." He bluntly states.
       I begin to feel numbness setting in. "Where the hell did he go?"
      "Umm...he left for Paris, I think? Or maybe America? I can't fucking remember. All I know is he's out of the country right now and don't know when he'll be back."
       "Why did he leave?" I choke out.
       "He got himself a modeling job-I thought Hoseok would have told you. He and Chaelin left together for a project. They'll be gone at least a year maybe...who knows." He grunts. "Listen, I need sleep. Call me later." He hangs up without another word.
      I let the phone slip from my fingers and just stare up at my ceiling blankly. He's gone. He left me-for real. I'm never gonna get a chance to apologize and get for forgiveness. I finally break and let the tears fall-sobs wracking my body until I pass out in utter exhaustion.
        I'm alone. Totally and forever alone. No more Kim Seokjin to brighten my ever darkening life. And it's completely my fault. I know I hurt him and I also know he never would have cheated on me-that kiss was something that I should have let him explain to me. How do I live without my other half? How do I breath without oxygen? How do I run with no one around to save me...

😂 sorry, couldn't resist the puns lol ignore my stupid randomness 💕 love you guys!

No worries-I'll try to have a couple more chapters out in the next couple days hopefully so yeah❤️