2007-
“Quick girl, get up soon” papa was shaking me gently. I opened my eyes adjusting my sight to the darkness. I am a rise- early –morning person. But this was too early. Its 9 minutes past 3 in the morning.
“Chinni get ready soon” he repeated again. The early morning or too early morning appointment with doctor uncle has created this waking- up- your- lovely- daughter job for papa.
All were up. Mamma, papa, grandparents and my Parta, Arjuna and Drona were already on their legs welcoming me down the staircase as I got down from my room.
“Who all are going?” I asked yawning to supply sufficient oxygen to my brain that has become dumb lately.
“Papa, you and Arjuna” mamma told.
“Why Arjun?” I asked in confusion. Why should a dog come to somewhere like this?
“He needs some fresh air too. He is dull these days” my grandfather answered me.
We rode nearly 20 km to reach the so called hospital which is actually a bungalow. The sky was still dark at 4. I was covered fully with sweaters and gloves. Arjuna was with me in the back seat and the heater in the car was like sun in Antarctica. My eye lid were half closed trying to get at least half sleep!
**
I opened my eyes to a natural light that was coming from the glazed glass of the roof. I didn’t know for how many hours I have been sleeping there. It was a usual thing from past 1 year. Doctor Uncle gives me a kind of transparent tablets, it kind of hypnotizes me and I would wake up an hour or so later and return back home for school. He said I have to be cured at the very delicate level of my being. That is the first level of subconscious. No other medicine but faith can cure me.
Previously as soon as I get up I would find my parents near me but today no one else was there in the room when I was up. There was nothing in that big room colored in white except me and the bed I was sleeping.
I walked out of the room in half dizziness. Dragging my legs that felt heavy. I felt I was carrying something on my head. Arjun was there at the door guarding me. Dogs are faithful always. I walked to the center of that bungalow searching for papa, Arjun followed me.
I saw an angel coming towards me. My angel. For a moment I thought I have been hallucinating and they were the effect of the medicine just like some previous examples. But it was not. I clearly saw him. The one with the roman god features…
Arjun ran towards him barking. I was panicked by his sudden reaction and wanted to stop him before he bites my Vishnu. I ran behind it in that long corridor. The heaviness that I experienced a few seconds back didn’t stop me from running my fullest to save Vishnu. I am still amazed at the power that love can give you.
To my surprise Arjun jumped on him and started licking his face and Vishnu hugged him back patting his head. Arjun never met Vishnu before but from what I saw it seemed both of them knew each other.
I was delightfully surprised. Who cannot like his charm? Even an animal is influenced by his charisma. He bent on his knees and Arjun seemed lost in licking him.
There were so many questions racing inside me. How come he is here? Or have I come somewhere else? Where is my papa or doctor uncle? Uhhh!!! I hate not knowing….
“How are you feeling?” he got up on his knees. Arjun stood wagging his tail.
I gave him a “what are you doing here” look, gasping for breath.
“I can explain.”
“Explain then. What are you waiting for” I could not stand without putting an end to my curiosity. I felt hard to speak anything. The words were followed by the heaviness in my head.
“Take it easy. We have all the time in the world”
I have long known the obvious fact that I dint have that lot of a time. Making him understand that is the worst thing I could ever do. I don’t know why and how I run away and come back to the same person. What should I say to such a thing? An opportunity? Unfortune? Luck? Or unluck? I was running out of anymore words. I really wanted to sit before I fall again on him like I did that day in Bengaluru.
“Where am I? Is this your place?”
“I can answer that later. For now…” I stopped him. Things are going out of my hand. I had enough of this can’t- do- anything situation for a while. I had to put an end to it. I had decided to enjoy my dying days rather than feeling guilty of leaving him. But this man, just like my fate is not leaving me.
“What the hell you think you are Vishnu? When I have already told you I really am not interested, why the hell do you keep on making me suffer? Just quit saying some dramatic lines and go away from here.” I wished I could die there when I heard me speaking.
“You don’t mean it Paavana” his eyes filled with tears.
My heart ached. What was I doing with him? With myself? In fact what’s happening? Why am I still living? I am breaking him. Where is the use of my intellectual or intelligence or whatever which I was once proud of?
“You like me being around you always, you are just not accepting it openly."
