you don't notice it at first, don't notice that you love her.
but then, of course, she's all you notice.
the way her olive eyes light up when she talks about something she loves.
the way her dirty blonde hair covers her face when she looks down.
the way her lips curl at the sides when she tries to hide her smiles.
love songs are suddenly calls of her name, you tell yourself they had to have been written about you two.
you don't just fall in love with her, but her presence and her words.
you fall in love with her laugh, her eyelashes, her lips, her grammar, her voice.
everything about her.
you are in love, wholly and uncontrollably.
you are sinking into a puddle of love and it is soaking into your pores and absorbing you.
it's only when you're drowning that you realize where you are.
when her smiles turn into disappointed frowns.
when her soft, sweet words are replaced with harsh and sour ones.
when you look her in the eyes and don't see the sparkles or soft eyelashes, but instead a longing for something she doesn't have, something that isn't you.
it's only when you're too late that you realize you are in love, and you are drowning in it, and she has taken your boat and made her way back to shore.
oops this is written about a girl i used to love for a very very long time. i don't love her anymore. but i'm gonna keep writing 'poetry' and it's probably gonna be about her some more too because she has ruined a piece of my life :) anyways enjoy this first publication on kinky4cas welcome to my shit-show <3
-s
