It's All Ready Written

The Dreamed Stopped~ The Portal was Closed

  When I was twelve on Thanksgiving Day my Dad's nurse (she worked in his office), my sister and I went to the stables to ride our horses. We had been riding for a while and I got off my horse because he kept bucking ( I wasn't a very strong rider) When I was getting back on I had my foot in the stirrup and about to swing on leg over to the other side Prince took off running. I remember looking up at my sister and calling her name just as Prince started bucking and I went off on the other side. I landed on my head and I knew I was hurt! I had on my favorite ragged Ann and Andy t-shirt. Now blood all over it, I cracked open my head, my right side was hurting so bad and my right arm was dangling at my side. We were about a mile or so from the barn and they help me up onto my sisters horse I did feel like I could walk back. But after I got up there and the horse took a couple of steps I couldn't sit up there it hurt to bad. So my only other choice was to walk back. I was in so much pain and Prince I knew felt so bad he walk right behind me with his nose close to my left shoulder. When we finally made it back to the barn my sister took care of the horses and my daddy's nurse helped my get in the back of her little Vega. We went past our house and Mother was outside walking her little yorkie. I remember pulling up beside her and has she is being told that we are heading to the hospital she looked in the back seat at me and she was calm telling me I would be alright and she would meet us there, but the look in her eyes as would be with any mother was fear. There is a privilege living in a small town and your Daddy being a doctor there. We pulled up to our little hospital and I remember dad's nurse telling the guy that came that I was Dr Knopp's daughter. He gently got me out of the back seat and carried me in. I remember they cut my favorite shirt off sewed up my head took a lot of x-rays I had dislocated my shoulder and caved in my ribs. Mother and daddy were there of course and now I was in a room. Mother was leaving to take care of my sister's and Daddy was in a chair next to my bed. I remember her telling me very thing was ok and she would be back in a little while and that she loved me. Nurses had keep coming in and checking my blood pressure and other vitals. Mother had come back and left again I not sure what time it was but I remember a nurse talking to Daddy who was still next to my bed and he looked and me and told me that I needed to go into surgery so they could look inside my tummy and see what was going on. My blood pressure was dropping. I remember the look in his eyes too being brave for me but he was scared. The surgeon was a friend of his and the nurse was dad's nurse that had been riding horses with us that day. They talked to me for a few minutes then put a black mask on me and said that I was going to go to sleep for a little while. I start to feel like I was spinning slowly and they were waving to me and telling me I would see them in a little while. I was smiling under the mask, I didn't feel afraid. Then I was up in the corner of the room watching them. Bright lights shining over my body there was the doctor and dad's nurse talking, He was looking through something in my belly button. And then I remember waking up with mother holding my hand and calling my name. I had torn my liver and had eighty stitches/ staples in down stomach / abdomen with a drain in my side. I remember seeing them working on me but I can't remember the details after they were using the scope to look around. I was in the hospital for a long time and I had a wonderful nurse that took care of me she was beautiful and kind and always in my room along with Mother and Daddy. Be fore I got hurt my sleeping positions were strange I would sleep with my back arched and my head touching my feet or I would wake up with my head at the foot of the bed stretched out every where. But now I couldn't sleep like that I couldn't lay on my stomach because of all the stitches, I couldn't lay on my right side because of the drain, I had to many stitches in the left side of my head to lay on my left side so I laid on my back. One day I ask mom and my nurse to try to move the bed with my feet up higher and change the position of my back and my head and the electric bed started to close the head and feet were straight up closing in the middle with ends meeting I am crying mother is trying to stop the bed from folding when they quickly unplug the bed and it continues to close even when it is unplugged. I was pretty sure some unseen force was trying to hurt me.  After a few months in the hospital I was released to go home Daddy bought me a waterbed to try to help me sleep better. After the bed was in place and you could no longer get under my bed the Pilgrim Dream stopped. It was like the portal was closed and I never had the Pilgrim Dream again.