I Am Not A Feminist I Am Just A Teenager (On Hold)

1.Rules

"I dont think chithu should go. It's not safe. Ravi tell her. She won't listen to what i say . Please, don't let her go to some place where we will never be able to know a single thing about her. " my mom's frantic and desperate voice was beaming in my ears. They were discussing The Things.

Whether I should go or not.

I went downstairs to see what will happen.

"I don't know Jyothy. I think she won't listen to me either. It was her dream to move on and live independently -"

"I don't care about it. I only care about my daughter and that's final. Just do i-"

"You want me happy isn't?" I said suddenly. "Then leave me alone".

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After so many lectures and fucked up rules I heard a yes from both the sides. My sister wasn't really liking the idea of me living with her. I could say that. She is married and is settled in NewYork.  I even told her that I won't stay with her and her husband . I will just go to a hostel or something.

I rarely smile with my parents. I still remember dad scolding me for squeezing sauce on his phone.

I never meant to do that. All I can say is that I was just five year old. Mom used to beat me till i hit twelve . No she isn't an abusive mother or something , she just wanted her daughter to be like perfect? Maybe.

I never understood women. Well being a women and not knowing the female category is weird . All I know is that , women are really emotional than men.

I am not really a emotional type.

I don't blush

I don't really have that love feeling even towards my family.

Who can love a person if he/she can't love his/her family, or more like mother?

Definitely no one. I don't know, maybe some people can.

I still remember asking the meaning of love to my dad. He just ignored me. I tried to ask it to my mom also. She just gave me distasteful look.

I think my family doesn't know it's meaning.

But I remember, dad giving a small peck on mom's forehead before leaving to office. Well, faint memories.

Tomorrow is gonna be a big day .

Sleep tight chaithanya

Oh I forgot about the RULES.

1 ALWAYS THINK ABOUT YOUR FAMILY

2 CALL YOUR PARENTS EVERYDAY ALSO INFORM YOUR SISTER

3 DONT EVEN THINK ABOUT DRINKS AND ALL.

4 NO SMOKING

5 NO RELATIONSHIPS( FRIENDS ARE GOOD BUT GIRLS ONLY)

6 NO TATOOS, PIERCINGS, REVEALING DRESSES

7 CONCENTRATE ONLY ON STUDIES AND NOTHING ELSE

8 PRAY TO GOD

9 DONT BOW YOUR HEAD TO ANYONE EXCEPT TO GOD

10 DONT VISIT ANY PILGRIMAGES OTHER THAN TEMPLES. ALWAYS REMEMBER YOU ARE AN HINDU.

These are the fucking rules.

Always think about family ? Nope can't do that . I am a human not a dog.

Calling parents? Will think about it.

Drinks? I will drink vine and cock and also beer. Huh silly aren't they?

Smoking? No I don't do them . I am not desperate to die.

Relationships? Seriously? And only girls.wow, a big no. That's so gender discrimination. Well whatever. Will think about it.

Piercings and revealing dresses aren't my thing, but tattoos are really my thing. And its a reason why I want to live alone.

Concentration? It's not in my dictionary.  I thought they might atleast know that about me. Who am I kidding, my parents?

Pray to God? I am not that religious. I believe in every religion. I am not atheist nor I am a theist. I am in between them . So  I will think about it too.

I don't bow to anyone. So that's not a big deal.

Don't visit PILGRIMAGES? Seriously.  THIS IS FUCKING shit.

What's the fun when you say don't and you don't even dare to step out from it?

Yep! No fun

Utter boaring.

To spice up I am gonna visit al, the pilgrimages. 

Orthodox much, arnt they? I am gonna prove that being this orthodox won't help you get a heaven .