Thoughts from the Fallen

It's hard to try and save the world , it's hard to get a good ending .

It's hard to keep everyone alive and healthy , keep them all happy with each other's company .

It's hard to stay alive yourself .

Especially when you're not living . You're alive , but not living . Depressed to the point of no return for your well being .

This is what Cara thought , as she sat in the inn . Her best friend , the one she's been travelling with ever since the world turned to complete shit , Angel , sat on the opposite side of the room , asleep . All her other teammates were in different rooms , resting and regaining their energy from the battle they all almost got killed in . Cara was sure she was the only one awake .

Many thoughts ran through her head , some thinking about the good endings they all could possibly have . They could defeat any evil , restore the peace in the land . They all could stay friends afterwards , adventure some more . Maybe go out for some drinks once and awhile . Start a relationship with Angel , the sweet girl on the other side of the room . This made Cara press a pillow against her face to hide the growing blush on her face .

Then came the negative thoughts .

What if one of their teammates died ? What if Angel died ? What if they couldn't thwart the possible evil plans that whatever evil the team was facing , and they were all killed ?

What if Cara died ? She was the team's only cleric , the only one that could heal everyone in times of need .

The thought made her shiver . Would she be reborn in a new body ? Would she just ghost around , watch as her teammates failed without her guidance or healing ? What if her beloved Angel couldn't handle the team anymore without guidance ? What if this happened to anyone else ?

Cara teared up a bit and sighed , listening in on Angel's squirming , before going completely silent . She shouldn't be thinking about such sad things , she shouldn't be thinking at all . She turned from the wall and stared at the small thief that sat on other side of the room , sleeping peacefully .

For now , the cleric would have to just wait . She couldn't think now , she shouldn't be thinking now . She should be resting , she should be catching up on whatever sleep everyone managed to get during the quiet night .

With a small sigh , the taller female slowly laid down and covered her body with the green blanket in her sleeping bag , not bothering to climb into the bag . She curled up so her body could fit under the blanket and shut her eyes , her body suddenly relaxing . This felt nice , being able to relax without any sort of worries . Without having to think of any possible outcomes in their adventures , without having to worry about their supply or about the group's relationships with each other .

It's easy to think of outcomes that could kill your friends , or of the outcomes that could save the world .

It's easy to worry about people , to give them concern for a simple little injury .

It's easy lay back and not give a care in the world .

Especially when you're fighting for your life , for the lives of those who were harmed , for the lives of the innocent .

You're alive but not living , thinking of any possible outcomes that you hoped would come to be . Whether it be someone dying , or be everyone living .