I hate that I love you

1 - Ciel's POV

Hello peeps! Before I start, there will be foul language and violence in this fanfiction, specifically targeted at homosexual people. I do not approve of this discrimination irl, it's for fanfiction purposes only. So please, if you're sensitive to that, just be cautious ^^
On a more positive note, this fanfiction is co-written so I will be in charge of Ciel's POV, and my good friend will be in charge of Sebastian's POV, so that will mean that there'll be doubles of each chapter.
With that being said, onto the fanfiction, we hope you enjoy! ^^
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"Oi, Phantomfreak!"

Everyday was the same; ignorance meant the laughter and taunting ensued, but retaliation lead to things much, much worse.

"Hey Faggothive, we're talking to you!"

Oh, I'm Ciel Phantomhive by the way, otherwise known as 'Faggothive', 'Phantomfreak', 'blind boy' or any other variation of those... Nicknames. I'm a pretty popular guy at my high school... But as you can probably guess, I'm not talking about a good kind of popular. Oh no, I'm popular in the sense that everyone knows me... And hates me.
You see, it may come as a surprise, but I'm male and that's one of the main points of my verbal and physical torture. Boys are supposed to be muscular and tall, with good bone structures and chiseled looks, and possibly a hot girlfriend. I am... None of those things; I've been mistaken as a girl more times than I can count, I'm tiny for my age and rather skinny, and I'm uh *cough cough* gay. So yeah, no hot girlfriends for me(!)
Anyways, the origins of my other nicknames come from my bi coloured eyes, which I cover with an eyepatch, and the fact that I dress a little freaky, I guess I could be called an emo. But that's enough about me, I should probably try to get away from those assholes.

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Ciel speed-walked through the corridors, shouldering past people on his way to English. Well... Attempting to shoulder past them, his height proving to be a liability yet again as he got elbowed in the back. With his teeth gritted, partially in anger and partially in pain, the bluenette managed to kick his classroom door open without so much as another scratch from anyone of the other pupils. That was a first, normally he got tripped up at least five times on the way to classes so he wasn't complaining.
He sat down quickly, not particularly enjoying the thought of having his chair pulled out from under him... Again. Of course, he knew it was inevitable to ward off the bullies completely but he had to hold out, if only for a few minutes. As if on cue, in strutted Ash Landers, Claude Faustus, and last but certainly not least, Sebastian Michaelis.
The much smaller male cursed himself mentally for the involuntary shiver that ran down his spine at the sight of the crimson eyed devil.

"You're hopeless Phantomhive, if he liked you even in the slightest, he wouldn't treat you like shit..." He downcast his eyes to the floor, and fixed them there while the three taller boys walked past him. He knew how this lesson would go, what with the three of them sat directly behind him.

After listening to the teacher drone on for what seemed like hours, Ciel promptly blanked out. But it wasn't peaceful, oh no, it was far from it.
One blink, a tug on his chair and a gasp later, he was on the floor with a split lip. The bluenette hissed through his teeth as he wiped the crimson fluid from his face, earning quiet snickers from behind him. Glaring behind his fringe and eyepatch, he stood up and sat back on his chair haughty, not in the mood for their usual 'fun'.

Even the most patient of people have a breaking point and all it took was some poking and Sebastian leaning over to whisper, "I heard your father blinded you in one eye, is that why you were that thing over it?" for Ciel to snap.

"Shut the fuck up!" He snapped loudly, drawing the attention of the entire room to him. The teacher wasn't impressed, to say the least. "Watch your language, Phantomhive!"

The small-for-his-age male only growled softly in response, grabbing his bag and shooting his now chuckling bullies another glare before he stormed out of the room.

He just stormed out of English, was that uncharacteristic? Yes.
Did he give a shit? No.

It was blatantly obvious to anyone that passed Ciel Phantomhive, that he was extremely pissed off. But only Ciel himself knew that his anger was only a mask to keep the tears at bay, he'd let them go when he was certain no one else would see. Once he made sure that he was alone, he immediately burst into tears and hugged his stomach. Phantomhives almost never cried, but after weeks of torment and abuse, who wouldn't cry?

He let sobs wrack his small frame, too distracted by his tears to notice a familiar trio walk round the corner and stop dead. Of course, they started to laugh cruelly, watching in glee when Ciel flinched back at the sound.
"What's wrong Phantomfreak, you scared?" Sebastian taunted.
"Look at him Claude, fucking pathetic!" Ash roared with laughter, eyeing up the small boy in amusement.
"Stop it..." Ciel's voice was weak and choked from the lump in his throat. He tugged his sleeves over his hands protectively, feeling utterly alone when Ash smashed him back into the brick wall. "Gah!" He winced at the feeling of his spine cracking and bit his already abused lip to stop anymore noises from escaping.
The other continued to taunt and yell abuse at him, sneering at the tears still pouring down his pale, porcelain cheeks. It was the final straw when Sebastian pinned him up by his throat.
"Stop it, stop it!" He screamed shrilly, his voice cracking while he sobbed harder and tried to protect himself from the blows behind dealt to his stomach.

What clearly wasn't a laughing matter before, suddenly became very  serious when the blunette felt his breathing become wheezy in an all too familiar way. 'Nonono, shit! Not now, please not now...' He thought in a blind panic. You see, Ciel Phantomhive was also prone to asthma attacks that always seemed to happen at the most inconvenient of times. This happened to be one of those times, unsurprisingly enough. He choked and wheezed loudly while fumbling for his bag, which was just out of reach. For the hundredth time this day, Ciel found himself damning his liability of a body, his arms being to short to grab his backpack off the floor.

Just before the small boy's vision went black, Sebastian delivered a final kick to his stomach and dropped him, letting Ciel land on the concrete with a sickening thud, where he shook with silent sobs. To say that he was hurting, would be an understatement, he was in agony, and not only physically. His every move was painstaking, his eyes prickling with fresh tears and he dragged himself across to his school bag.

Ciel didn't have a problem with facing a painful truth, no one cared... And no one was ever going to. His classmates averted their eyes to the broken shell of a boy lying like a wounded animal in the corridor, not wanting to risk getting attacked themselves. His parents would care, very deeply so, but he couldn't bring himself to tell them the true cause of his injuries. One day it would be an accident from tripping down the stairs, the next would be a soccer injury, so on and so forth. In short, Rachel and Vincent Phantomhive thought their son was stunning, intelligent, perfect. They even found his 'deformities' beautiful, which was a change from the norm. 'But aren't all parents meant to think that, I doubt they'd call me ugly or dumb to me face. Even if they think it.' Ciel thought bitterly while he grit his teeth and pushed himself to his feet as quickly as his weak body could muster. His breathing returned to normal after he had a few short puffs from his inhaler, the wheezing and coughing subsiding.

Before he turned to limp away, he turned to Sebastian with his eyes blazing. He didn't care about the other two, but couldn't stop the painful twanging of his heart when his blue eyes met crimson ones. "I hate you." Ciel spat harshly, before spinning on his heel and limping to his next class.