The Broken Road that led me Straight to You.

"I set out on a narrow way, many years ago, hoping I would find true love, along the broken road..."

You'll never know how good it feels to be dancing with the one true love of your life under the hot lights in her basement, her body pressed against yours, your hearts beating in sync, swaying gently back and forth to a Rascal Flatts song, knowing that you don't have all the time in the world, her scent so familiar to you that if she were to disappear, the memory never would, and you're only sixteen. And tilting her head back to get a better look at her hazel eyes, which are filled with love- for you. Her hair is down, you having hastily tugged the elastic out of it, wanting to get at her silky strands of hair, the calmness invading both of you, the hitch in your breath becoming more and more noticable, because she's taking your breath away. The red strands in her hair, are almost highlighted, her dark brown hair so similar to your own, so close to being siblings, yet so far. And when you press your lips to hers, it's hard not to love her. 

"But I got lost a time or two, wiped my brow, kept pushing through, I couldn't see how every sign, pointed straight to you.."

But knowing the pain you've caused her to get to this point doesn't help. You wasted five years of your life, trying to forget about her, but in reality, you were just hoping to be called back. But most heartbreakers don't get a second chance. Your father forcing you away from her was painful, excruciating, and not being able to tell her why was the worst part. So instead you blundered blindly through the last five years of your life, hoping to get over her, to get past her, and failing miserably, because you were a fool not to contact her. Even if you would have gotten in trouble, she's all you had, and you blew it, a shiny new uniform, not worth the cost.

"Every long lost dream, led me to where you are, others who broke my heart, they were like Northern stars, pointing me on my way, into your loving arms...."

Yes, but the next time you meet, you and the love of your life, she's tainted as well, by memories she'd like to forget, her own heartbreak still fresh in her mind, a boy who chose her best friend, when she couldn't stop herself from falling for him, and paid the price. When the echo of a gunshot was what her life came down to. Pushing her best friend out of the way... well you don't pretend to understand what happened. But all you know is that though most of her physical wounds have healed, you still can't get rid of the mental scars, and she's still frightened.

"This much I know is true, that God bless the broken road, that led me straight to you..."

And so when you reach down, pressing your lips to hers, spanning a gap that's lasted five years, and caused enough scars to last a lifetime, and all you can feel is just waves of love radiating out from your very core, knowing that you love this girl, and she loves you back, even if the moment is slightly tainted by your parents' ongoing divorce, by her reduced lifespan, you know that you need her, more than anything. Even though your friends are observing, even though your chances of being together are slim to none, you still can't lose hope, because with her soft lips pressed to yours, you have to know that she is in love with you, and you love her back, you can't help it, because you've spent so long, both of you, fighting your feelings, but it's a happy loss when you finally give in.

"I think about the years I spent, just passing through, I'd like to have the time I lost, and give it back to you..."

And all through the rest of the year, you and her, now your girlfriend, spend your time, making up for all of your wasted time. Days studying together for various exams, celebrating her birthday, and making the slow transition into a lazy summer, the two of you spending days lounging by the pool, covered in sunscreen, nothing but tanned skin, the bright colours of bathing suits and her sunglasses flashing in the sun. The nights where the sun stays up with you, celebrating the mystery that is your relationship, music chasing the summer away, into the crisp fall, where a return to school separates the two of you, yet you're never far apart, watching movies and going out on weekends, celebrating your birthday too, the fall colours dazzling on the eyes, but to you, nothing is as beautiful as her, and then the fall melts into a frosty winter, where your breath mingles in the cold air, when you have snowball fights, her cheeks flushed from the cold, her eyes wild with excitement, breathless too. And the two of you celebrate Christmas, a cold one, but it is your first Christmas since becoming friends again, a monumentous occasion. And one year melts into another one, the years continuing to pass by without a second glance back at the days past.

"But you just smile, and take my hand, you've been there, you understand, it's all part of a grander plan, that is coming true..."

And then years later, when you're both in your early twenties, knowing that you don't have forever, you make a plan, that you'll follow, because she is just a dream. She is your dream, looking more beautiful with every passing year. So when you get down on one knee, and offer yourself to her fully, why are you so surprised when her answer is yes? She's so excited that night, her eyes shine, and the two of you are so excited, you can barely believe that it's happening, when both of you had once thought it never would. But now, she's agreed to be your wife, absolutely and completely sure that's what she wants. In fact, you only have to go through two people to get to her: her best friend and her father. Having gotten their permission, you and your fiancee begin to plan a wedding. After all, why would you want to wait? You can't wait, because she is so close to being yours, you love her more than anything, because you need her.

"Every long lost dream, led me to where you are, others who broke my heart, they were like Northern stars, pointing on my way, into your loving arms, this much I know is true..."

And then the day arrives, the day when she becomes your wife, and you're so amazed at her beauty, that it stuns you into speechlessness, as she walks up the aisle on her father's arms, looking absolutely radiant, and who can blame her? And in that moment, your heart nearly breaks with pride that the beautiful woman before you is going to become your wife at any moment. The smile she gives you is tearful, but the both of you have been through so much that it's almost impossible not to think that you're absolutely in love with her. And as you recite your vows, you can't stop staring at each other, because you're perfect for each other. Later that evening, the same old song comes on, as she's nestled in your arms, swaying in time with you, it suddenly dawns on you that you have the rest of your life with her. She's your wife. And when you lean down and kiss her, it's the most sincere kiss you ever will give her, because she's all that you have. The two of you have the rest of your life together, to spend together. And not just as friends, as husband and wife.

"That God bless the broken road, that led me straight to you."

You think that you could never be happier than you are the day of your wedding, but then comes another day, another beautiful summer day, when another long lost dream of yours comes true. You and her had almost stopped hoping that it would happen, and when you found out, you were shocked and excited. She was told it wasn't safe to happen, that it probably wouldn't happen, but you knew differently. And when she nearly breaks all of the bones in your hand, you're crying, but not because your hand is in pain, but because she is, and they're happy tears as well. And finally it's over. And you're a father to a little boy born a bit early, but perfect in every way. A son, with your hair, and her eyes. Her beautiful eyes, carried on in a legacy of your love. You give him a perfect name, and you know that just like his mother, he will be perfect. He has to be. And so your little family of two becomes a family of three, proving medical science wrong. You're so grateful for a son, a son that shouldn't exist but does, and you know that you've got something of her to hold on to.

"Now I'm just a rolling home, into my lover's arms, this much I know is true..."

But the day finally comes, a day that is sunny, but shouldn't be, a day where your heart breaks in two. That same old song plays softly in the background, as she clutches your hand. Her hair hasn't even started to go gray, and there are no wrinkles in her face. She knows that she won't be staying much longer. Her eyes are clouded with pain, but how can it be, she is only 42. She is almost breaking your hand again, and though  it hurts, nothing could hurt as much as knowing that you'll have to raise your son without her from now on, knowing that you'd known all along that she was going to die, none of it makes it easier for either of you to bear. But instead of complaining or breaking down, she simply offers her same heartwarming smile, the smile that won your heart, and whispers the three words that she's always been willing to say, words she's given easily. "I love you." she tells you, but then her eyes slowly slide closed, as you repeat the words back to her, and as her hand goes slack in yours, a million memories flash through your mind- childhood memories of the two of you teasing each other, people mistaking the two of you for siblings, the first kiss in her basement, the years that followed, your impromptu engagment, the beautiful day that she became your wife, and the wonderful day the two of you became parents. But you know that she's gone now. 

And the words are still on your lips: "I love you."

But how do you live without your other half?

"That God bless the broken road, that led me straight to you...."