My mate!

~ 2

Even though I had survived a couple of nights, it's still hard. Actually, when I woke up this morning, I had Astra on my mind. Our last night together and that we made love. I miss him. But just thinking about him, makes my heart sink down. He's missing for six years now. I don't even know why he left me? I never got an explanation. Was our last night together, not good? Or did he find his mate and that that is the reason why he left? The feeling of emptiness got a hold on my body. Something I feel in my heart. It even makes my wolf whine and howl. Why? What did I do wrong? Or is it just me?

Now, I'm looking outside. The wall between the meeting room and my office is open so I can look outside. Normally, that would calm me down. Actually, I should be doing some paperwork. Maintain the connection to the other packs. Since we have a special wolf academy for our children. Every pack in America send their children here to be able to study and train. It's something my great great great grandfather set up and it's been a success to anyone.

'Hey, how are you doing?' Cyril comes inside, with a knock on the open door.

I turn my head to him. 'I'll live.' I answer while going back to my desk. To review the evaluation from the students. Something that happens every year. That way they will be somehow a little involved with small changes. 'How's the pack doing?'

Cyril nods. 'Everyone is slowly picking their life back up.' He puts a document on my desk. 'I've taken the liberty to change some to the patrols. They go in teams of four now, especially with the students here, and four times a day. If a rogue has the guts to set one paw on our land, we will know about it.' He points it out to the schedule. 'If there's a slight change of a threat, then it's five patrols. Two will be at night.'

'That would be better.' I understand and my eyes go to the schedule. 'Have you heard from Ronon and Toby?'

This time Cyril shakes his head. 'No.' He puts his hands in his pockets. 'Honestly, they don't want to come back. Not until they have something. They hate it to come back empty-handed.'

A little upset, I lean backward in my chair. 'Just keep contact. No matter what they find, I want to know.'

'Of course.' Cyrils' eyes are dazed. 'It doesn't matter how long it takes but we will find him back, Austin.'

Feeling sad, I stare in front of me. 'I'm starting to think that I'm the last one left of my family. Maybe Astra is dead too...'

'I refuse to believe that if I haven't seen a body.' Cyril interrupts me. 'Do I have to remind you about Pandora? She unleashed all evil and you know what's left on the bottom?'

I sigh deep. 'Just because there's nobody, doesn't mean that he can't be dead. Maybe there's nothing left to identify him.'

'It's hope, Austin. Have faith and don't abandon hope. It will work out in the end. You'll see.' Cyril has this look in his eyes like he wants to convince me or something. 'Don't do this. Don't assume the worst.'

'Is there anything else?' It's hard to keep my control. Just like it's hard to believe that there are still plans for me. Why do I have to lose my entire family? Only to survive it myself?

Cyril exhales with a sigh. 'For now, it is.' His eyes are standing sad and he leaves me alone.

I can see that he leaves my house. Though, I live in the alpha house by being the alpha, doesn't mean I like it. This whole place reminds me of my family. My own family. People I love and yet they all abandoned me. I don't get it. I know that I still have my pack but if I didn't have that, I could've ended it myself.

And then Cyril tells me to keep hope. Hope for what? I lost my father and my mother. My brother is missing for six years. For the last four years, I'm looking for him. It's like he doesn't want to be found. Or he's dead and somehow they didn't mention it to me. A sad feeling goes through me, to nests it's way into my heart. As if it doesn't want to go away. Astra, please, come home! I miss you. I need you!

Knowing that I won't be doing much work anymore, I go outside for a run. Leaving my clothes right next to the tree, which is the closest to the house. I checked the schedule and no one is on patrol right now. That would make it a lot better.

~•~

I know, it's a short one. But so is this story. This won't count up to like 40 chapters or something. More like 20 chapters. It's more about healing, finding each other and forgiveness. 

Stay tuned for the next update.....