Of Prompts and Scribbles

One Rainy Night

To those who love the rain.
To those who loved despite the pain.

July 20xx

The city passed by her car window like a blur. It was already night time and Xaris was on her way home from work. She enjoyed listening to the quiet pattering of tiny raindrops on the ceiling, and the way the city lights burst into wonderful colors of red and yellows and blues against the tiny globes of water that scattered. She has always loved the rain especially at night. She has this belief that the rain washes away everything-- that everything is new after each rain.

Xaris stepped on the break when the traffic light turned red. A bright yellow light from her peripheral view caught her attention. She turned and found a local fast food chain. Then she felt a soft tug on her consciousness. Déjà vu?

"Ah, yes," she mumbled as she remembered why the scene felt familiar. It was because of this particular rainy night three years ago.

Three years ago

"Are you sure about this?" Xaris asked for the second time. "You can treat me out some other time."

"Yeah, I'll be there. It's just a simple rain," he said over the other line, followed by a soft chuckle.

Xaris smiled. Never had she been treated that way. She grew up getting used to doing things alone. She handled her life without trying to be a burden to others. She got used to being left behind and alone. And as far as she could remember, that was the first time someone told her they'll come despite the ugly weather.
He arrived an hour after and they had friendly dinner at a local fast food. Never had she gone out alone with a guy before. And that night, it was already their second time to eat out, still, as friends.

During the first time, she had butterflies in her stomach. She was worried she might bore him or turn him off because she's too awkward. It was so surprising to her that it actually went well. They talked and laughed as they ate their meals. She even shared her food--something she actually disliked due to her big appetite—with him.
The second time went great as well. They shared inside jokes and stories they never told anyone. Slowly, she felt her walls started to crumble-- no, scratch that. He didn't break her walls. He climbed up on them brick by brick with every laugh he replied whenever she babbled anything weird or crazy. He did so each time he guessed the song title whenever she randomly sang a song from a movie. He climbed up on them easily with the way he used smart words that excited her every time because she liked deep talks and sensible conversations. She told him things and expected he'd turn away and yet he didn't. Each time they talked, she felt like someone has finally kept up with the riddle that she was.

For a long while she had prayed for the Lord never to let her fall with sugar-coated words again. For the first time, she met someone whose actions spoke louder than any word invented... someone who finally understood. But then again, somehow, she needed words. Words she herself failed to say. She pushed him away.

She pushed him away each time and played the role of the best friend who's always there for him. She linked him to women she thought he'd like. She introduced her to her friend and teased him about her every time. She pushed him away when all she wanted was for him to stay.

She knew the rain was coming and she thought she wasn't prepared to dance in it even after feeling the drizzle that dropped against her skin. She hid under the safety of her umbrella instead of letting herself enjoy it. And when she realized it's finally time to step out, the rain was already gone. She was left alone with the traces of the rain that passed that smudged her clothing. He was the rain she regretted not dancing in.

Present

"It has been three years..." she whispered. She looked up at the ceiling, closed her eyes and sighed. She was at the local fast food's parking lot. "And I still wish I had the courage to step out into the rain."

"Why didn't you tell me?" he asked.

She heaved another sigh and killed the engine. And for the first time in a long while, she stepped out into the rain.

"I was scared. I hoped you'd tell me it's me you wanted every time I pushed you towards her. I thought I wasn't ready."

The rain was almost gone; it was so close to fading into drizzle. She knew it wasn't much but it was a start.

"I'm sorry I didn't know. I'm sorry... I love her."

Because maybe the rain will wash away the remnants of the storm named after a person. Maybe the rain will wash away the pain for the one she pushed away— perhaps one would say, the one that got away.

- END -

Xarisavee © 2017