Summer Knights

“Zoe?”

I knew who it was, but to avoid seeming pathetic for having kept his number so long, I pretended I didn’t.

“Yeah. Who is this?” I replied

“It’s Elay. Hey”

I couldn’t decide how to feel about him texting me.  Elay had sort of confessed his liking for me back in January. Only for us to text for less than a week. Then he dropped out of school, and disappeared from the world. My world.

Elay had grasped my attention in a way no other guy had. Not that any of them tried. I was in the 10th grade, and for some stupid reason I had this mindset that I needed someone to save me. To pull me out of the abyss I had been dragged in my by my demons. Almost like I was gonna find this love and it would be a new awakening for me. But in reality, I had watched the Twilight Saga too many times, and John Greens shitty yet amazing books had gotten to me.

Realizing it had been over 5 minutes I replied, “Oh hey. What’s up?”

“Nothing. Hey I know this is kind of out of the blue, but can you meet me later?”

It was the middle of summer. All my friends were on vacation, and my mom was in Texas with her fat ass boyfriend. Plus I had been craving for something spontaneous to do all summer.

“Sure” I replied.

“Cool. Meet me at McDonalds at 10:30”

“Alright”

Elay worked at the truck washing station across the street from McDonalds. Even though there were several in my town, the one on Airport Road was the best, and it was three minutes from my hous. I wonder if he knew that.

It was 9:50 so I decided to leave out early so I could actually eat before he came. I had thought about what I was going to wear since I read his message. I was going for this “slouchy” kinda “I was in bed and just through something on, but not really” kinda look. Then it almost seemed that the feelings, or whatever those were, that I had for him were reappearing (As if they’d ever left). I ended up wearing my favorite band t-shirt, shorts, and my favorite converse. I figured he’d still be in work clothes anyway, since he got off work at 10:15. Yes, I’m a creep for knowing that.

I got to McDonald’s at 10 o’clock. I decided to not eat because I was too nervous, and felt nauseous. I had been secretly waiting for Elay to come crawling back into my life, rekindling what we once had. Only because I never knew why we stopped talking, and I never got closure. Over the past few months he would send subliminal messages on social networks. Favoriting, liking, etc. I had also seen him at the county hair where I almost died of embarrassment from tripping. Right in front of him.

It was 10:27 and I had already broke a sweat from my anxiety. I didn’t call any of my friends like I usually would have. It would’ve made it worse. I listen to Queen Badu and tried to drown out the sound of my heart.

Once 10:30 hit my heart sank a little bit with each car I saw. I didn’t know what kind of car he had.

Then, I saw him. He had a dark complexion. He was short too, maybe an inch taller than me, but I didn’t mind. I wasn’t sure whether or not he had muscles. I had never seen him without a shirt, and he looked pretty skinny. I suddenly remembered the night at the county fair and how fat I felt when I hugged him. My heart was in my stomach again.

I quickly turned around t avoid making eye contact as he approached my table. Then I heard, ”Hey”

His voice was kind of soothing. I looked up to find his beautiful brown eyes staring down at me. They told a thousand stories with one glance. Almost getting lost in them he spoke again.

“Is it alright if we use your truck? I’ll drive”

<p>“Sure, but where are-“

<p>He was headed toward the door after “sure”

I then got the sudden idea “What if this fucker kidnaps me? What if I get raped, or killed?”

I observed his small stature and concluded that I could escape. But what made me uneasy was that he was so edgy. Like there as something on his mind. It was that, plus the fact that I had no clue where we were going that lead me to think “okay he really might kill you”

The ride was silent except the music I had playing in hopes that he would be impressed. He wasn’t. I was just thinking about saying something when he said “we’re going to the pond by the way”

“Okay” I said making it awkward for the rest of the drive.

As we pulled up to the pond, four things occurred to me:

1. I can’t swim

2. Its dark as fuck

3. I’m scared of the dark

4. This is where he’ll hide my body

He parked the truck, turned off the engine, and stared at me. I uncontrollably blurted “I cant swim”

He smiled “we aren’t swimming”

I wasn’t sure if I was ore happy or scared.

He looked at my backseat and found my guitar.

“oh shit, you play?” he said “you gotta play for me”

“O-kay but why are we-“  I started, but he was already out of the truck. I began to get frustrated with him for not answering me questions, or letting me finish them. I grabbed my guitar and followed him. I found him sitting in the back of the truck. After getting situated, I asked “any requests?”

“surprise me” he said. I had one song in mind, it was the one I usually played whenever I was asked to. But then I thought of another song. One that would secretly reveal my true feelings for him. After all, he was the king of subliminal messages.

I played a song I though he might’ve known, but by the looks of his face he didn’t. I also sang which, given away by his face, he didn’t know either.

I could sense that he absorbed the message from my song. But with every verse I felt more free knowing that the burden of my thoughts that had for so long consumed me were now floating in the air. When I finished I looked up to find those troubled eyes staring at me. My heart was in my stomach again

“So uh, did you lik-“ I began when I saw a tear roll down his cheek. The last man I saw cry was my dad. I remembered standing over him, yelling that I hated him for marrying a new woman. His baby girl, hated him. I never got to apologize.

It was then that I felt nauseous, and I wanted to cry too. But watching him cry was like looking in a mirror. I remembered all the nights I cried. For a split second I was happy he felt what I did. Feeling guilty I hugged him.

Within that short amount of time I developed a deep sympathy for him. I…I loved him. Being in that position made me care for him like no other. I wanted nothing more than to make him smile, make him happy letting him know everything was okay. And it wasn’t until now that I realized, he wanted me to save him.