Beyond Repair

Chapter 1

You can live your life fast,

Or you can just take it slow.

Keep hold of the happiness,

And let the pain go.

-Anon

=Chapter 1=

An irritating ringing sounded next me, rolling over I groaned and pressed my pillow to my ear but the shrill sound didn’t stop it only seemed to become worse. Opening my eyes and gripping the corners of the pillow, I swung it and hit the bedside table causing my alarm clock to land on the carpet with a soft thump.

Stretching my arms out widely a huge yawn slipped past my lips, reminding me how tired I really was. I just wish that the nightmares would stop but no matter how many times my father’s death replayed inside my head it was impossible to get use to the shock of the car hitting him and the way that the his life faded from his eyes, somehow I knew that I would never be able to get use to the images.

Swinging my legs over the side of the bed and reaching down I grasped my exasperating clock and switched it off before placing it back onto my empty table. Sighing I got to my feet causing my ankles to crack, and looked around at my empty room and unpacked moving boxes. Having no pictures on the walls and none of my belongings where they should be was an odd sight for me, I knew that I was going to have to sort all my stuff out sometime soon but I couldn’t bring myself to get down to work - to me it felt like if I did then my reality would hit me full in the face, it would finally become real that I had moved house.

After my dad passed on everything changed mum decided that we were going to move out of our home because it reminded her to much of the times her and dad spent on the place and all the plans that they had together.  I could understand how painful it was but moving out of the place that had been home for 17 years was a huge deal little lone moving over to a completely different state and finding a new place in Chicago.

Shaking my head I hurried out of my room and down to the bathroom I didn’t have to be quiet I knew that I wouldn’t wake anyone up. Along with moving mum had taken up a full time job that required her to be out of town for real estate business so I rarely saw her anymore which was just another thing that I found myself having to adapt too.

I stood in front of the spotless mirror and watched the emotionless girl with dark sapphire eyes and high cheek bones with long black hair that cascaded down her back and ended in soft curls around her waist, she had lightly tanned skin that graced her slim almost flawless limbs. But if you look closer you would be able to see the slight purple bags that hung under her eyes and the slight hollowness to her face that showed she didn’t eat enough.

Cringing away from the glass I stepped closer to the shower, I hated how I looked now so tired and... Weak. Groaning I turned the shower on and jumped inside nearly sighing in content as the warm water started relax my tense muscles, times like these I treasured to just be able to shut my thoughts off and forget what my life was like, it made me almost feel the way I use to.

Slowly I climbed out and tightly wrapped a towel around my torso before making my way back towards my room to get changed into some cool clothes that I wouldn’t get to hot in. That was another thing about Chicago compared to Canada where I lived before, the temperature here was ridiculously hot at the moment this fact alone made me dislike the place even more than I already did.

Clothed and heading down stairs I walked into the untouched pristine kitchen, this was probably one of the rooms that would hardly ever be used inside this big house with mum barely home there was no one to cook food, well not counting me anything I touch or try to cook in kitchens somehow manages to catch fire in some way or another I have learnt my lesson to never attempt to tame the food.