I Love You Still

One Shot

Hey.
It's been 5 years and 3 months since we broke up. I know you're over it( but i wasn't so sure if that relationship is real or not) you look happy now and I should too. I still get some news about you from our mutual friends, specifically to our high school friends, when I heard all of it I don't know what to react but I know I should be happy for you. We've been classmates since the day that classes starts.

I know we don't have a formal break up, that's why days or months after our break up, we're always fighting like cat and dog, we're always arguing, talking behind each other's back, in short we really hate each other. I don't know why or how. And I remember, our friends still teasing us about the past or what, we do always react on those small things they say.

And when the prom comes, we became partner in a dance, it was an awkwardly situation for the two of us since we both have partners(Bf/Gf) and they're also part of it. But when the day arrive, I don't know how it began, we started to talk to each other like nothing happened, we were laughing together with each other's company.

So now, until we graduated high school, we've become close. We do always hanging out with our friends.
And until, this day comes. We've attended a debut of our friend. They were times that I was looking to you, and there I saw you happy and how your eyes sparkle. Those were the laughs and smiles that I first saw when we first talked.
That night, there I realize that when we always talked, I was like so angry at you, I don't know why, like I really hated you that much. But then, when we were at the kitchen talking to each other, and not until you kissed me, I wanted to stop you but I can't because, there I realized that I miss you and still love you. There I realized that for 5 years, I'm still not get over you. I know, you're happy now with her, I can see it through looking at you,the smile you have when you talk about her to your friends and you always give time to call her,( just like how we used to be years ago). But then, when I said to you that I'll go outside you but you told me to wait for you and I asked you for what I'll be waiting for you, but i heard you murmuring, I know I didn't heard it clearly but as I remember you said that "Waiting for you is only what I do" after hearing those words, I looked at you for a minute, and I slowly walked.

When it's time to go home
while we were on a bus, we sat at last column of the bus with our friends, you started to put your head on my shoulders and you suddenly put your hand on mine, you were sleeping on my shoulder while holding my hand. I still remember how you smelled, the Jap 5 years ago. and 'til now, you still do smell good.
I don't want to assume things, because I know, it won't be the same things like 5 years ago.

So before this day ends, I decided that I should let go of my feelings for you. How can I be truly happy if I'm still stuck in the memory of us? How can I love again, if I'm still stuck between the idea of you and me? It's time for me to move on. You'll always be, mi amore. Jap

-Pik