Actually no, I got something else to say hihi.
I'll say it as I want to 'cause BITCH, IT'S MA BOOK SO MH.
I cried like 4 times today, which didn't happen since like, months (srsly, I don't even remember the last time I cried except from today). And what's funny, it's that when there's a day I'm feeling down, it's always the one my friend is the most bumped up? Like whuut gurl ya must be kiddin' meee
I'm struggling real hard rn 'cause I wanna say what's on my mind but not to much 'cause I don't want y'all to think I'm an attention seeker like some others are 🙃.
But anyways.
I'm really sad these days 'cause my relation with my mom sinks more and more everyday and she used to be like, my best friend before I left for my school trip and when I came back, she told me this trip would make us realize how much we "need/love" each other (call it like u want, idcc) but no..?
What I mean is that I missed her A LOOT during the trip, but it didn't brought us closer afterwards? And my dad is soon out of service and it's gonna be even harder for me and my mom to get closer 'cause my relation with my dad has never been a cotton candy dream (🙄) , and my parents are always together when they're both free.
I just want my mom and I to get close again, talk and laugh like we used to... I used to love coming back home to see my mom and tell her what happened during my day but now, I just go to my room immediately and never get out of it except for eating and wash myself :((
I really love her, she's most probably the most precious human being I have and I don't wanna lose her just because I put my energy on my studies these days since it's the end of the semester.
Same goes with my friends : my group of friends and I... I really truly love and cherish them, they're one of the best thing, if not the best, that has ever happened to me... But we kinda grew apart this week? Because I spend all of my lunch times at the school's cantine (what is it in English, fuck.) or meetings, and my breaks with teachers or at the library to finish my works, I almost never see them... And none of them are in my program, so I'm like TT 24/7. It's also my friend's birthday party this weekend but I can't go since it's in a restaurant whose food mainly contains peanuts/nuts, and I'm fucking allergic ffs.
I also stopped taking my pill on a regular basis 'cause I always forgets it (clever, really clever Maggy) and I feel like it has some effects on my mood and overall behaviour.
Argh.
I hate my life rn.
Bon, bye là~
