The Stigma of a Butterfly

Part I

Taehyung's p.o.v

"I am sorry Taehyung..."

We were standing in front of a shop in the evening Friday market.

I looked nowhere but at her deep blue eyes.

Like the ocean.

The very same eyes that were now trying to hide signs of longing and pain.

But the light from the deli made it hard to miss the glistening of her tears.

"I cant do this anymore.."

I could hardly believe what she was saying.

"We need to break things off.."

My ears refused to let her voice in and my head started pounding.

"Don't get me wrong Tae.... I love you, I really do.. but I.. I just can't.."

The world began to spin.

"Goodbye Taehyung.."

I could do nothing but stare.

"Goodbye.."

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The sound of cars honking on the streets and the voices of people talking all around was piercing.

The lights from the shops were too bright.

So I blocked the noise and the voices out and instead focused on my feet that carried my body forward with great difficulty.

6 years...

She had let 6 years of our relationship go..

Did the past 6 years mean nothing to her?

Did I mean nothing to her?

I was still in a shock and my body had gone numb...

But what I couldn't understand was the absence of tears...

Why were there no tears streaming down my face yet?

Was I expecting her to break up with me?

I do not know...

Yes, the past few weeks with her were different..alien...
She wouldn't stop by at my place and we would spend little hours together.

But this?

May be the tears would come later.

May be not today.

May be tomorrow.

I sighed heavily and continued walking towards my house in a nearby apartment.
As I reached the front door, my feet lightly collided with something and there was a 'clank'.
I looked down to see 2 bottles kept beside the door.

2 alcohol bottles.

Shit.

Dad (Appa) was home.

And he was drunk.

I quickly opened the door and entered my dingy excuse of a house and there, in front of me, with a belt in his hand was the Devil himself.

My sister was on the floor, bleeding already with the skin of her back red and torn away.

And I knew... I knew.

"APPA!" I screamed, grabbing his attention and buying some time for Noona.

I went down on my knees and continued begging.
"Please Appa, it was a mistake! It was my fault! Please don't punish Noona... beat me instead!"

But my pleas fell on deaf ears.

He continued beating her, and me, being the helpless and scared mess that I was, tried to crawl towards my bleeding and screaming sister.

When I was close enough she whispered "Run away Tae.. r-run a-way.." before finally closing her eyes.

She was breathing.

She was still breathing.

And then, Appa, in his drunken state, delivered the killing blow.
The scream was horrible; I knew it would become the source of my worst nightmares.

I saw the light slowly leave her eyes and I ended up staring at her green orbs...

Her beautiful green eyes.

The ones that were enough to comfort me with a single glance. The ones that warmed me up on a cold day.

Her beautiful green dead eyes.

I looked down at the rest of her broken body.

Her hands..

Even in death, her hands were pointing towards me...

But never reaching me...

I heard a low growl from next to me and looked up at the bastard who had killed his own daughter.

The anger and fury burning my body was unimaginable.

And then all hell broke loose.

I grabbed hold of the nearest broken bottle, and after landing a few punches and pushing him towards the wall, I used it to stab him in the stomach.

I stabbed him twice...

Thrice...

But the anger didn't vanish.

And just like that, he was dead too.

I had no regrets of what I had just done.

I let the broken bottle fall from my hand and shatter into a thousand pieces on the floor and went back to my sister.

I laid down next to her and craddled her dead bleeding body against mine.

The tears finally came.

*I am sorry I am sorry I am sorry my brother,
Even if I try to hide it, or conceal it, it can't be erased.
Are you calling me a sinner?
What more do I have to say?
I am sorry I am sorry I am sorry my sister,
Even if I try to hide it, or conceal it, it can't be erased.
So cry, please dry my eyes.
That light, that light, please illuminate my sins.
Where I can't turn back, the red blood is flowing down.
Deeper, I feel like dying everyday.
Please let me be punished.
Please forgive me for my sins.
Please*