The Heart Wants What It Wants ✔️

Ch. 36

I woke up with my eyes puffier than marshmallows. I skipped school since it was probably already third period. I entered my bathroom and saw the damage that I created in my sad break down yesterday.

Flashback

I continued to sob on my bathroom floor. My depressing thoughts took over my brain, and all I could think about was how worthless I am. I had let my guard down and started caring,so now this happened. I got hurt.

I'm such a fucking idiot

I stood up and looked at myself in the mirror. My eyes were puffy and red. My hair was a mess and my face was stained with tears. I looked and am pathetic. I glanced to my side and saw the red lipstick.

'Why not give yourself a reminder for you to remember everyday'

I decided to take my advice and do so. I grabbed the lipstick and began writing on the mirror.

Pathetic

Stupid

Ugly

Weird

Loner

Clingy

Failure

Freak

Weak

And for the grand finale, I wrote in big letters.

W O R T H L E S S

I stared at the writings on the mirror. This was going to be reminder so that I will never forget again. I will never forget how worthless I truly am.

End of Flashback

All the writings were still there. It was a great reminder...

Don't get me wrong, I wasn't depressed over that little thing with Jaxon. What he said triggered a break down yesterday. All the sad emotions that I've been bottling up just burst. My thoughts were running wild and scenarios started playing in my head.

I saw Chris, Mali and Emma doing the exact same thing all my old friends did to me. I saw them leaving and betraying me. I saw them turning their back on me. I saw them doing it over and over.

All these scenarios were breaking me. The memories of my past friends and their betrayals just hurt so much. Seeing it happen again but with my present friends doing it hurt even worse.

I sighed and shook my head. I wasn't in the mood to break down twice. I hopped in the shower and took a long hot shower. The water was so hot that my skin was turning pink, but I didn't care. I felt numb. After showering and putting on a fresh set of clothes, I stepped out of my room to reveal a sleeping Mike. He was sleeping right in front of my bedroom door.

I smiled lightly and walked over him. I went downstairs to see a plate of pancakes set on the table. I walked closer and took the paper that was under it. Sighing as I read the paper, I decided to just crumple it and throw it away.

I'm sorry ~J

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I stayed at home the whole day. It was now probably around the time that school ends which means Chris, Mali, and Emma would be here soon. I didn't want to face them at all. I wanted to be alone to recollect all my emotions and feelings.

An idea came into mine. I put on my shoes and called Mike. He didn't need his leash anymore since he knew to just walk beside me or in front of me. This dog is more loyal than any of my other friends. He stays by my side all the time.

We walked to the park since that's the only place I could think of. I sat on a bench nearby the playground, and Mike sat by my feet. I sighed and looked up at the sky that was beginning to set.

I felt a smile creep on my face. This was peacful. I should go out more. That apartment was suffocating me. The sky looked very pretty as well. Just sitting here with my dog by feet and the sky in my vision made me feel calm. I felt my troubles wash away just for a moment.

I heard footsteps coming closer and I pray that it wasn't anyone I knew. I felt that person sit next to me. Mike stands up and begins to growl, but within a few seconds, he's quiet. I turn my head to look at Mike to see him happily chewing on something. Next to him was a siberian husky also chewing on something.

"It's a dog treat." Says the person next to me. I turned to finally look at the person, thanking the Lord that it wasn't anyone I knew. Seated next to me was a guy around my age. I could feel a blush coming up for being seated next to a really attractive guy. His blue eyes matched his black hair. His hair looked so fluffy and messy. He wore a simple light blue hoodie and black skinny jeans.

"Hey, Miss. You okay?" He asks, snapping me out of my daze.

"S-sorry." I blush a bright red. Nice one, Harley.

"Heh, it's fine. Is he your dog?" He asks looking at Mike

"Yeah" I smile at Mike who looks up at me

"What breed is he?" The stranger asks

"He's a mix of a German Shepherd and a Labrador" I say

"What's his name?"

"Mike"

"What's his owner's name?"

I look to the guy with a grin and he looks back at me with one as well. The only difference is he has a sheepish grin.

"That was really smooth" I say

"I try" He shrugs

"My names Harley" I say

"Tyler. Nice to meet you" He smiles

"What's your dog's name?" I ask

"I'm really bad with names, so I just call her Luna. She seems to like it anyway." He pets his dog and feeds him another treat. Luna eats her treat happily while Mike watches longingly. Tyler laughs and hands Mike a treat as well.

"I'm gonna say thanks for him" I chuckle

"It's no problem." He smiles

We barely talked the rest of the day. All we did was sit next to each other and watch our dogs play around. When we did talk, it was mostly about our dogs. We may have just met, but we were completely comfortable in each other's presence. We both learned the basics about each other like our age and where we study. We both swore that we weren't some bad person who was gonna track the other down and kidnap them or whatever.

We ended the day by exchanging numbers and bidding each other's dogs goodbye. I left my peaceful spot and began my journey back to the suffocating house I call home.

Opening the door, I sighed at the sight. I'm back drama, missed me? Apparently so.

"Hey guys" I say to a Mad Chris, an upset Emma,a Mad Mali, a worried Reece, a stone faced Kaden, and a sad looking Jaxon.

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Sorry if it's shitty and boring 😂😅 I tried my best. I'll update again soon to make up for this shitty chapter.