Ange (girlxgirl)

Chapter Thirty-seven

The lights in the lounge flicker on after a few minutes of knocking. I'm starting to feel out of control like at Jake's. The porch lights flicker on and through the window, I see a silhouette making it's way to the door. The locks click and the door swings open, revealing Miss Winnett in a dressing gown pulled tightly around her.

"Yes?" She says harshly, squinting through her eyes that are probably hazy and not yet awake. She finally manages to focus on my face and she looks concerned. "Ange, what is wrong?" She asks fretfully.

"Hey, Nat," I say, feeling overwhelmed by the sight of her and the drinks combined.

"Are you ok?" She steps closer to me and I retreat, her gaze falls onto the bottle in my hand.

"I'm fine, I just need to tell you something," I say quietly, looking into her eyes which are full of genuine concern for me.

"Ange, maybe if you've drunk all that you should tell me when you are sober," she is pointing at the bottle.

I look down at the bottle, a far bit is gone. I loose my balance and stumble, back I regain my steadiness when Miss Winnett grabs my elbow, I gently shake her off.

"It's ok, I'm fine." I step back again so that I'm not allured by her.

She pulls her dressing gown tighter and crosses her arms. "At least come inside, it is freezing."

"No, I'm telling you this and then going."

I take another gulp of vodka and screw on the cap, dwelling over what I'm going to say.

"Ange, that will do, you will regret it." She grabs the bottle of vodka from my hand.

I sigh. "You know that feeling you get when you love something so much you have to clench your teeth or ball your fist?" She looks at me like I'm mad but sees the desperation in my face and nods quickly. "I have that feeling a lot of the time, but I have it all the time when I'm around you or think of you. I also have had that pain in my chest and it took me a while to realise it is heartbreak. I have had my heartbroken twice, when Mum died and then when I had to tell you that kiss was nothing. It wasn't nothing even though I tried desperately to make myself believe that. I thought I liked you in a motherly way, I have never been 'in love' so I guess I was unsure of what I felt." Miss Winnett stares at the ground as though fixated by it. "That kissed killed me but also made me alive, it filled me with hope and then it took it away straight after. It confirmed my feelings for you but it also made me realise things I have tried to bury for ages, I couldn't brush off liking you with a bottle of vodka this time. So, I have accepted it and it drives me mad, you drive me mad. I can't love you openly because of a lot of things, but at least I can tell you and get it off my chest."

Silence settles around us and the wind rustles the leaves in the street. Miss Winnett is still focused on the ground and my vodka bottle rests in her hands. I turn, feeling as though a huge weight has been lift from my chest but also like I'm about to go through another heartbreak.

"Ange." It is barely a whisper, but I hear it and spin around.

Miss Winnett is looking at softly while a few tears leek out her eyes, she steps towards me and I don't back away. "I shouldn't love you, but I do." She whispers before kissing me passionately and wrapping her arms around my neck.

The kiss is better then the first and it doesn't stop as we stumble inside and close the door. She puts down the bottle without breaking away and starts to unzip my pantsuit. I kiss the inside of her neck, nibbling gently on her ear causing her to gasp slightly. We back down the hallway and into her room, I tug at her clothes and push her onto the bed, holding her hands above her head.

"I have wanted you for so long," I murmur into her ear.

"So have I."