Life

Hey Y'all

Hey guys!! 😁 *waves hand frantically* 👋👋👋👋

I doubt anyone will actually read this but I don't really care, its just a place for me to rant really.

Let me introduce myself. Ahem.... my name is Lucy but I hate it. It's just such a boring name or is that just me?? About two years ago a couple of my friends, India and Charlotte, came up with the name Friendship for me. It wasn't just random by the way, we aren't that crazy, well I am. It was to do with what we were learning in English at the time.

I'm English (it sucks). I'm 15 but nearly 16. I would post a photo of me but I don't really take photos of myself and also I'm fuck ugly so it would to blind you guys. ooh look, first swear of the chapter and the book!! Yaay!! Anywho, I'm a little weird (understatement of the century) and very, very crazy. I praise people for swearing.

I am also quite forgetful so I may repeat stuff. I'm bisexual but not many people know about that yet. I have a brother, he's a dick. I have insomnia so be prepared for updates at like 1am. I have depression and social anxieties but I don't really talk about it because it makes me feel like more of a freak than I already am. By the way I am in no way saying that if you have depression and/or social anxieties you are a freak, its just how I feel about it myself. I hate feeling this way. I can't even sit on a bus without having an anxiety attack, which is bad because I have to take the bus to and from school most days.

I am emo and proud to be, so please don't judge or hate. I love My Chemical Romance, Panic! At the Disco and Fall Out Boy. I like other music and artists too though. But I'm not going to lie, I'm listening to Fall Out Boy while listening to this. I love Queen, Frank Sinatra, Green Day, Paramore, etc. Essentially my music taste is broad. 

Fandoms and Bandoms are for life. There is no escaping. I love Supernatural, Sherlock, Merlin and Doctor Who. I'm so excited for the next Doctor, I think a female Doctor is going to be great.

In most of the rants I post I will probably sound like a snob that needs to grow up but I will try not to because that's not who I am.

I am currently in my last year of secondary school before I go to sixth form and to be honest I am hating every fucking minute of it. Who the fuck cares about fucking waves?? Or Anglo-Saxon England?? Or Norman England!! Urgh, history sucks so much.

You could probably call me a nerd. I fit the criteria. Does well in most subjects?? Check. Wears glasses?? Check. Carries around a folder for no particular reason?? Check. Studies as hard as possible?? Check. Wants to do well in GCSEs and A-levels?? Check and check. Wants to go to university?? Double check (I cannot wait). Hates PE and any form of exercise?? There is not enough "check"s in the world for this one. For my A-levels I want to take maths, chemistry and biology but my backups are English language, psychology and either history or English literature.

I want to go to university or med school, get a medical degree and become a paediatric surgeon. Sadly, I probably wont be able to afford that so I'm thinking of getting a medical degree through the army or the RAF, that way I get paid whilst training. the only downside is well the exercise. I hate exercise. I'm such a lazy little shit.

I have a really low self esteem, self worth and all that shit. The world would 100% be better off without me in it but for some reason it doesn't seem to want to let me leave.

I just want to put this out there but suicide and self harm is no laughing matter and I don't give a shit who you are if you make jokes about it I will hunt you down and kill you.

I have some really great friends who I love. I also have some really shit friends who i still love but lets save that for another chapter.

I hate most of my family but I love my dog and my dad to bits. My dad and my friends are basically the only humans I love. I would chose animals over people any day. I know humans are technically animals but who cares about pedantics?? Not me, that's for sure.

Okay I'm going to go now because you're probably all bored of me now.

"Geesus. It's all 'me me me' with this girl isn't it?? When will she just shut the fuck up??"

I did say I was crazy. Bye guys thanks for reading this shit. Or not reading it or whatever.

~Friendship